Scott Adams Quotes
125 quotes
in 1650 categories
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It doesn't take many people to have a bad sense of humor to get in trouble at a corporation.
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My investments have been hurt.
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One way to compensate for a tiny brain is to pretend to be dead.
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We must develop knowledge optimization initiatives to leverage our key learnings.
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Women are treated differently by society for exactly the same reason that children and the mentally handicapped are treated differently.
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I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and…
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'Dilbert' became popular during the downsizing of the '90s, and job security was a major theme of the strip.
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For most of my career I did one comic a day, every day, including weekends and holidays.
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If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
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Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
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Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
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Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.
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Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating,…
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.
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In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better…
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Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.
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You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even…
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There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot.
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The best things in life are silly.
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