Dont go around saying the world owes you a living,the world owes you nothing because it was here first — Mark Twain Life Copy Share Image
Hero: Person in a book who does things which he can't and girl marries him for it. — Mark Twain Book Copy Share Image
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards. — Mark Twain Education Copy Share Image
“men's misfortunes are forgotten in the excitement of new enterprises. This” — Mark Twain Business Copy Share Image
Facts, or what a man believes to be facts, are always delightful - Get your facts first, and - then you can… — Mark Twain Speech Copy Share Image
Our lives, our liberty, and our property are never in greater danger than when Congress is in session. — Mark Twain Congress Copy Share Image
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it. — Mark Twain America Copy Share Image
To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government and the sure and gradual deterioration… — Mark Twain Bad government Copy Share Image
The low level which commercial morality has reached in America is deplorable. We have humble God fearing Christian men among us who… — Mark Twain America Copy Share Image
There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Yet little Tom was not unhappy. He had a hard time of it but did not know it. It was the sort… — Mark Twain Hard time Copy Share Image
He had had much experience of physicians, and said, the only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“And when he awoke in the morning and looked upon the wretchedness about him, his dream had had its usual effect: it… — Mark Twain Dreams Copy Share Image
The Impartial Friend: Death, the only immortal who treats us all alike, whose pity and whose peace and whose refuge are for… — Mark Twain Death Copy Share Image
“The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a… — Mark Twain Bad idea Copy Share Image
Adam was not alone in the Garden of Eden, however, and does not deserve all the credit; much is due to Eve,… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“He killed all those people -- every male. They had offended the Deity in some way. We know what the offense was,… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Man is the Reasoning Animal. Such is the claim. I think it is open to dispute. Indeed, my experiments have proven to… — Mark Twain Animals Copy Share Image
“His grandeurs were stricken valueless: they seemed to fall away from him like rotten rags. The procession moved on, and still on,… — Mark Twain Captivity Copy Share Image
“Within two minutes, or even less, he had forgotten all his troubles. Not because his troubles were one whitless heavy and bitter… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Talking of patriotism, what humbug it is; it is a word which always commemorates a robbery. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Memories which someday will become all beautiful when the last annoyance that encumbers them shall have faded out of our minds. — Mark Twain Annoyance Copy Share Image
Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
How far we travel in life matters far less than those we meet along the way. — Mark Twain Life Copy Share Image
Music is a good thing; and after all that soul-butter and hogwash, I never see it freshen up things so, and sound… — Mark Twain Bully Copy Share Image
Sometimes you gwyne to git hurt, en sometimes you gwyne to git sick; but every time you's gwyne to git well agin. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The reason why truth is so much stranger than fiction is that there is no requirement for it to be consistent. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“A man must not hold himself aloof from the things which his friends and community have at heart if he would be… — Mark Twain Aloof Copy Share Image
“It's considered good sportsmanship not to pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.” — Mark Twain Famous-authors Copy Share Image
I heard a Californian student in Heidelberg say, in one of his calmest moods, that he would rather decline two drinks than… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The man who is a pessimist before forty-eight knows too much; if he is an optimist after it he knows too little — Mark Twain Opportunity Copy Share Image
I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; I always feel that they have not said enough. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Reputation is a hall-mark: it can remove doubt from pure silver, and it can also make the plated article pass for pure. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
No, I have no desire for riches. Honest poverty and a conscience, torpid through virtuous inaction, are more to me than corner… — Mark Twain Conscience Copy Share Image
Who is this Renaissance? Where did he come from? Who gave him permission to cram the Republic with his execrable daubs? — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There is more real pleasure to be gotten out of a malicious act, where your heart is in it, than out of… — Mark Twain Heart Copy Share Image
I told you this would happen. But, no, you had to go for the buffet, didn't you? — Mark Twain Buffet Copy Share Image
He has been a doctor a year now and has had two patients - no, three, I think - yes, it was… — Mark Twain Doctor Copy Share Image
No one can write perfect English and keep it up through a stretch of ten chapters. It has never been done. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
All say, ‘how hard it is that we have to die’ -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of those… — Mark Twain Complaints Copy Share Image
