I remember, after the Pamela Anderson roast, being told, 'You're sold out - you can add two more shows.' — Lisa Lampanelli Being Copy Share Image
When I say I'm going gangster, I'm working really hard at something. — Lisa Lampanelli Gangster Copy Share Image
I don't sell myself. I've never explained my comedy to people who don't get it. Never complain. Never explain. — Lisa Lampanelli Comedy Copy Share Image
I'm not a political comic at all, so it would be weird if I just turned into a preachy, sort-of political commentator. — Lisa Lampanelli Comic Copy Share Image
Larry the Cable Guy has everything: sleeveless shirts, stupid catchphrases. He's Mr. T without the acting chops. — Lisa Lampanelli Acting Copy Share Image
I've gone through literally over 30 years of struggle with weight and food and body image... and I'm like, 'Wait a minute.' — Lisa Lampanelli Body Copy Share Image
I'm decorating my parents' house for Christmas... I hope they find my manger with a baby yeezus in it as funny as… — Lisa Lampanelli Baby Copy Share Image
Insult comedy has been around forever. I can make fun of people, and they won't get mad at me. — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
By being politically correct, you're closing your mind to a different point of view. Which sounds a lot like prejudice. Which is… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
Too many people have already lost their lives to HIV and AIDS, and the more celebrities who can bring attention to the… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
I'm a take-no-prisoners type of comic, and I'm lucky because my fans get me and never have a problem with the politically… — Lisa Lampanelli Comedy Copy Share Image
I'm not a private person. I like hanging out and talking to fans. But my life isn't so interesting that you want… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
I have rage and anger issues. So I get mad about stuff in real life, and then I yell about it onstage,… — Lisa Lampanelli Anger Copy Share Image
I wasn't ready to be a dog's mother! Trust me, I'm completely unfit and irresponsible. I'm a comic that travels 48 weeks… — Lisa Lampanelli Dog Copy Share Image
I got sick of trying everything. I tried every single thing imaginable - diet, exercise. I even bought a house on the… — Lisa Lampanelli Diet Copy Share Image
Even going on stage is a service because it brings people up from thinking about their lost job or their lost spouse… — Lisa Lampanelli Comedy Copy Share Image
Comedy is like music - there are genres and styles for every taste. Katy Perry is there for people who like frothy… — Lisa Lampanelli Art Copy Share Image
Every day, I wake up and ask, 'Am I hungry?' If I'm physically hungry, I eat something that's hopefully good for me,… — Lisa Lampanelli Day Copy Share Image
Mr. Trump, I really can't comment, because he was my boss on 'Celebrity Apprentice,' and I just don't think we should let… — Lisa Lampanelli Birth Copy Share Image
Basically, I think some of the weight helped take some of the walls down in reality, so basically I got a little… — Lisa Lampanelli Confident Copy Share Image
When doing comedy, I do what makes me laugh. The first person I learned from said I should talk about things I… — Lisa Lampanelli Comedy Copy Share Image
Howard Stern gave me the best advice about Twitter and the N word. He said maybe onstage people get the intention behind… — Lisa Lampanelli Advice Copy Share Image
That's the whole thing: You only roast the ones you love. That's why I never make fun of the French. — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
I know Bea Arthur left the Pam Anderson roast really early, but it could have been because she was half dead; I… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
I gained weight, and that started a 32-year struggle with weight and exercise and body image problems. — Lisa Lampanelli Body Copy Share Image
This thing happened where I noticed anytime I got together with four friends or more, the conversation goes to food. — Lisa Lampanelli Communication Copy Share Image
Shortly after college, I was working in New York City at 'Rolling Stone' magazine. — Lisa Lampanelli City Copy Share Image
Make a list of the people in your 'choir'... If you're not on your own list, then you're doing something wrong. — Lisa Lampanelli Choir Copy Share Image
The only reason I was allowed to have a career for a quarter century as an insult comic is because it's all… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
Betty White is so old that on her first game show ever, the prize was fire. — Lisa Lampanelli Fire Copy Share Image
I always wrote about myself in the third person. I knew how to promote myself so it sounded intelligent. I know how… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
What you bring to the stage is what you are in real life... people sense that. — Lisa Lampanelli Life Copy Share Image
When you're dealing with a sick person, you're not important at all. You're just a nobody. — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
What we do as comics can be a service to people. It can make them laugh and take their mind off their… — Lisa Lampanelli Comics Copy Share Image
I've really been working on the emotional and internal issues that made me eat in the first place. It's been a real… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
I lasted seven years as a journalist, and I've been doing comedy for twenty years. — Lisa Lampanelli Comedy Copy Share Image
William Shatner is living proof that if you are talented and nice, you can work in this industry forever. — Lisa Lampanelli Actor Copy Share Image
I can really serve the audience instead of making this about me and about serving myself and my pocketbook. — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
I have a shrink in New York and a shrink in Arizona, just in case. You never know when you will have… — Lisa Lampanelli Breakdown Copy Share Image
I'm not ready to die yet. I have, like, 40 years left that I have to make up for all of the… — Lisa Lampanelli Copy Share Image
