Leslie Jordan

I don't sing. I don't dance.

— Leslie Jordan

I don't go out at night.

— Leslie Jordan

I love, love, love South Florida.

— Leslie Jordan

I'm Southern to the bone.

— Leslie Jordan

I grew up in Chattanooga.

— Leslie Jordan

We've got to be kind.

— Leslie Jordan

I won an Emmy in 2006!

— Leslie Jordan

I love my family dearly.

— Leslie Jordan

I was there when APLA was started in somebody's living room.

— Leslie Jordan

The only thing I know how to do is be funny - that's it.

— Leslie Jordan

I'm on the road almost eight months of the year.

— Leslie Jordan

I'm very proud of my Southern accent, it's part of me.

— Leslie Jordan

I fell out of the womb and landed in my mother's high heels.

— Leslie Jordan

I was always the class clown. I was always the funny one.

— Leslie Jordan

Honey, I conquered Netflix. I watched 'em all.

— Leslie Jordan

I can spot a homosexual at forty paces.

— Leslie Jordan

I really think 'Straight Outta Chattanooga' is one of my best shows.

— Leslie Jordan

My daddy - whenever he wanted to teach us a lesson, he'd tell us a story. It's an Old South tradition.

— Leslie Jordan

Growing up, the main thing I was ashamed of was my voice. It is very effeminate.

— Leslie Jordan

I've always been interested in forensics and the way they solve things.

— Leslie Jordan

That's the secret to happiness. Find something you can make money at that you really love to do.

— Leslie Jordan

There are two or three ways to combat homophobia - one is through humor. The second is to put a face on…

— Leslie Jordan

I'm Southern, I'm gay, I'm little - I get Ma'am'd a lot on the phone.

— Leslie Jordan

At one time, when I was younger, I exercised regularly and had a 27-inch waist.

— Leslie Jordan

I honor the sanctity of all religions - I'm not here to put them down. But the only religion that I personally…

— Leslie Jordan

People are realizing that being gay is just as defining as the color of our skin and it's not a choice. I'm…

— Leslie Jordan

I talk about things that happened in my life. Now, do I embellish? Absolutely. Come on, we all do it. It makes…

— Leslie Jordan

Big Brother' has put me off people. I thought, 'I'm gonna get a dog.' I really think I'm going to become more…

— Leslie Jordan

I'd do an exercise video because there are so many gay men with these perfect abs and they do exercise videos. So…

— Leslie Jordan

In a perfect world we'd want gay people to play gay people, but I think that's a good rule of thumb: Whoever…

— Leslie Jordan

The church was everything: our social engagements, Sunday morning, Sunday evening. Wednesday night was the hour of power. We had Bible study…

— Leslie Jordan

I had that perfect deadpan ... for these commercials. Within the first eight months I had eight national TV commercials. I'm a…

— Leslie Jordan

When I was writing the book, I thought "Who wants to hear another story about some actor who lost his way?" But…

— Leslie Jordan

I honor the sanctity of all religions - I'm not here to put them down. But the only religion that I personally…

— Leslie Jordan

My mom will never march in a gay pride parade with a big sign. She is very private. She lives in Chattanooga.…

— Leslie Jordan

You know, you learned that very young in American culture that the feminine boys don't do well. And yet, I had a…

— Leslie Jordan

A state rep in Oklahoma gave a horrific speech where she felt the homosexual agenda was a greater threat to America than…

— Leslie Jordan

I was raised in a religion that I never felt embraced me. That wasn't her fault. I had this amazing childhood. My…

— Leslie Jordan

One of the main reasons I started writing these one-man shows was that this really evil casting director once said to me,…

— Leslie Jordan

People are really surprised when they meet me that I'm a recluse. People think I'm very gregarious and outgoing - and I…

— Leslie Jordan