Jon Richardson

I don't really talk to people.

— Jon Richardson

I've never said I have OCD, as I haven't been diagnosed.

— Jon Richardson

I don't mean to hate people, I just get forced into it.

— Jon Richardson

No book has ever made me laugh as much as 'I, Partridge.'

— Jon Richardson

It is so much easier to grieve for the dead than to care for the living. At least in death we are…

— Jon Richardson

Having a child has been the most unexpected privilege, as I spent so long on my own thinking it would never happen.

— Jon Richardson

I don't think I'd have any friends if I didn't obscure at least 99% of my thoughts.

— Jon Richardson

I try not to listen to the other comedians performing before me because they will probably be funnier than me.

— Jon Richardson

When I'm filming a documentary, I feel like I should be the straight man, watching with a raised eyebrow.

— Jon Richardson

To say I wasn't such a hit with the ladies would be a very kind way of putting it. I was a…

— Jon Richardson

I get quite frustrated about a lot of things on a day-to-day basis. I can't help it; it is an impulse with…

— Jon Richardson

Why do fools fall in love? I'll tell you why, because everybody else has simply got too much else to do.

— Jon Richardson

'One Leg Too Few' by Peter Cook is a perfect sketch. The setting is ridiculous, the language is beautiful, and the performances…

— Jon Richardson

“The only honest answer when someone asks you if you love them is 'at the moment, yes', but try saying that without…

— Jon Richardson

Stand-up is still my job. That is the thing I wanted to get into when I was 21. You cannot beat the…

— Jon Richardson

There are many problems with being a comedian: the travel, the late nights, the pressure, the fear of running out of funny…

— Jon Richardson

I love the privilege of looking back on my life every three years, turning it into a comedy show, and sharing it…

— Jon Richardson

Each show is a very honest portrayal of how I'm feeling that night. It can go off in any direction. The show…

— Jon Richardson

It would be nice to be a piece of toast. Everyone likes a piece of toast, don't they? No one is ever…

— Jon Richardson

If I watch 'The X Factor,' I know I'm never going to aspire to sing, so I don't mind if they're good…

— Jon Richardson

When you are single, you're invested in the world because you have to be, because that's all you've got. When you have…

— Jon Richardson

I think anyone can bake, but I don't think I can bake well. I sort of feel like baking is just, like,…

— Jon Richardson

A 'nidiot' is something different from an idiot. An idiot is someone whose problems are caused by not concentrating enough. A 'nidiot'…

— Jon Richardson

I need to keep my ad-libbing skills honed and make sure I'm able to banter with people and treat topics a bit…

— Jon Richardson

Early thirties for women is a very intense time. If you want kids, and you're not in a relationship, there's an urgency…

— Jon Richardson

“Such is my desire only to see the best parts of my partner and vice-versa that I must confess to being able…

— Jon Richardson

When you're single, you're not beholden to anyone, and you can shut down more easily. In the past, I had the idea…

— Jon Richardson

The last time I went back to a girl's house for an impromptu house party I spent most of the night straightening…

— Jon Richardson

“Any second... now? No. I am a 'mourning person'. Not because anybody close to me has recently passed away, but because I…

— Jon Richardson

I'm all about the slapstick, generally. If you fell off it, into it, or through it, I'm probably nearby wetting myself.

— Jon Richardson

I don’t need someone to complete me, I need someone to make things a little bit better every now and again.

— Jon Richardson

I like small parties with people I know. I like eating pizza at home with my girlfriend.

— Jon Richardson

“Happiness, like sleep, in order to be fully effective must involve some sort of yielding of conscious thought.”

— Jon Richardson

I'm still very much a Northerner. I try to have chips and gravy twice a week.

— Jon Richardson

I think a pessimist is just an optimist who has had their heart repeatedly broken.

— Jon Richardson

I love paying tax so much, the sight of a gritter lorry gives me an erection

— Jon Richardson

“I suffered with a desire to be alone, unfortunately coupled with an intolerance of others.”

— Jon Richardson

In reality, as a comedian, you're successful because you're funny, and you should be able to be funny about anything.

— Jon Richardson

I really like stews: everything in a bowl boiled down right to its essence.

— Jon Richardson

Anyone who tells you that it is better to have loved and lost that to never loved at all has never done…

— Jon Richardson