Guy Browning

(1964) Comedian

9 quotes in 74 categories

Guy Browning is a comedian, best known for Never hit a jellyfish with a spade.

Quick Facts About Guy Browning

Born: January 1, 1964
Profession: Comedian
Notable works: Never hit a jellyfish with a spade

About Guy Browning

Guy Browning is an English humourist, after-dinner speaker and film director. He wrote the How To... column in The Guardian from 1999 to 2009. Before that he wrote about office politics and social climbing.

Biography source: Wikipedia

Quotes by Guy Browning

Never work for a company that says people are its most important asset. If you wanted to get a mortgage and you…

Guy Browning

Assets

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Growing up is when you understand you get what you give, not what you're given.

Guy Browning

Given

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Libraries are brothels for the mind. Which means that librarians are the madams, greeting punters, understanding their strange tastes and needs, and…

Guy Browning

Book

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Major cities are divided into two parts; the bits that are in the guidebook and the bits that aren't. If you don't…

Guy Browning

Bits

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As the world becomes ever more crowded, so folding will become ever more important.

Guy Browning

Crowded

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Men love women because they are the loveliest things on God's earth. Women love men because chocolate can't mow the lawn. Some…

Guy Browning

Behaviour

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To turn ordinary clothes into gardening clothes, simply mix with compost.

Guy Browning

Clothes

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What makes a date so dreadful is the weight of expectation attached to it. There is every chance that you may meet…

Guy Browning

Buried

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People who get to the top of any organisation are generally dysfunctional human beings who are overachieving, overcompensating or overbearing.

Guy Browning

Human beings

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