Greg Proops Quotes
16 quotes
in 208 categories
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I understand that smoking is vaguely inappropriate in certain situations. You know, like an orphanage, cancer ward, whatever.
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I love animals. I couldn't eat a whole one but I'll split one with you if you want.
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You leave white people alone in constant isolation for 2,000 years, and you know what their musical contribution will be? Riverdance!
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Honesty and unpopular opinions are the toughest sell in a country with an irony-deficiency.
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It doesn't matter how much of an asshole you are, there was always someone who thought you were cool.
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If Iraq's weapons are weapons of mass destruction, surely ours are weapons of growth and nurturing.
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Yo. I'm from Beverly Hills, and I be pimpin'.
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I thought the Egyptians had cured baldness.
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I would like to thank ABC for giving me the Drew Carey award. It only goes to one lucky guy with glasses a year, and…
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How would you like to make money in real estate?
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President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps.
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Arizona changes its state motto to Damn, it's hot.
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And eat lots of mints, it fools the cops.
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Ever since you're little you hear this: 'The pilgrims left England to escape religious persecution and sneak religious freedom into the new world.' But even…
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People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.
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Animals have two vital functions in today's society; to be delicious and to fit well.
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