Men know something that women don't know. Never ask directions of a stranger. — Craig Brown Ask Copy Share Image
Children are perfectly happy to sit next to spiders; it is only grown-ups who are frightened away. — Craig Brown Away Copy Share Image
The news is increasingly full of mismatched people saying daft things to one another. — Craig Brown Another Copy Share Image
Like many men, I am highly skilled in the art of losing things but prefer to outsource the recovery process. — Craig Brown Am Copy Share Image
Historians are the consummate hairdressers of the literary world: cooing in public, catty in private. — Craig Brown Catty Copy Share Image
The first sign builders are on their way is when - hey, presto! - a skip appears outside your house. — Craig Brown Appears Copy Share Image
My father, a captain in the 5th Battalion of the Queen's Own Cameron Highlanders, landed in Normandy the day after D-Day. — Craig Brown After Copy Share Image
As a rough rule of thumb, I would say the smaller the pond, the more belligerent the fish. — Craig Brown Fish Copy Share Image
Some of the most untidy writers have also been the most productive. Iris Murdoch, for instance, wrote a good 30 books in… — Craig Brown Also Copy Share Image
There are few things quite so effortlessly enjoyable as watching an eminent person getting in a huff and flouncing out of a… — Craig Brown Effortlessly Copy Share Image
Like Christians, Soccerians argue that you should not judge the essence of their faith by the loopy activities of its followers. But… — Craig Brown Activities Copy Share Image
You might think that religion was the one area in which professional jealousy would take a back seat. But no: ecclesiastical memoirs… — Craig Brown Any Copy Share Image
Whenever television cameras are interviewing people in their homes, I tend to look over their shoulders and have a good snoop at… — Craig Brown Always Copy Share Image
Traditionally, wake-up calls are meant to wake you up rather than send you to sleep: the clue is in the wording. But… — Craig Brown Calls Copy Share Image
I have twice met Jeffrey Archer, and on both occasions was struck by the firmness of his handshake - and the way… — Craig Brown Both Copy Share Image
In real life, nothing would be more tedious than trailing around after two strangers as they went house-hunting in Hertfordshire. But for… — Craig Brown After Copy Share Image
Personally, I belong to the speedy school of golf. If it were left up to me, I would introduce a new rule… — Craig Brown After Copy Share Image
How I hate the Beautiful Game! I hate its cry-baby players and its gruff, joyless managers, its blokish supporters and its sinister… — Craig Brown Analyst Copy Share Image
“Without anything being said, there were no women at our lunches. Not that we were talking pussy. Or not much. But it… — Craig Brown Christopher-hitchens Copy Share Image
“One evening, at the time of the Six-Day War, I [Christopher Hitchens] had my wicked way with a lovely lady, who had… — Craig Brown Christopher-hitchens Copy Share Image
“I [Christopher Hitchens] moved into Mart's sock—where you lived was your 'sock.' Your rug was your 'hair.' Your knee was still your… — Craig Brown Christopher-hitchens Copy Share Image
Poets, for example, are generally considered starry-eyed and sensitive, but only by those who have never encountered one. — Craig Brown Considered Copy Share Image
All the wealthiest people in the U.S. seem compelled to brag about how humble they are. — Craig Brown About Copy Share Image
One of the many joys of tongue-twisters is that they serve no purpose beyond fun. — Craig Brown Beyond Copy Share Image
Alan Whicker may be the last Briton to have worn a silver-buttoned blazer with complete confidence. — Craig Brown Alan Copy Share Image
A decent beard has long been the number one must-have fashion item for any fugitive from justice. — Craig Brown Any Copy Share Image
It is only if you happen to be a newscaster that the tongue-twister spells peril. — Craig Brown Happen Copy Share Image
When cars honk and hoot and drunks squeeze out of car windows and scream, you can be sure that football is in… — Craig Brown Air Copy Share Image
One of the tricks of life is to have sense and money in roughly equal proportions. — Craig Brown Equal Copy Share Image
The only behaviour that is truly common is to avoid doing something because you think others might consider it common. — Craig Brown Avoid Copy Share Image
The British love of queuing and discomfort and being bossed around seems to have found a new outlet in the pop festival. — Craig Brown Around Copy Share Image
My life is a monument to procrastination, to the art of putting things off until later, or much later, or possibly never. — Craig Brown Art Copy Share Image
More and more, I find that the news reads like a particularly random game of Consequences. — Craig Brown Consequences Copy Share Image
There's nothing wrong with procrastination. Or is there? I'll leave it to you to decide, but only if you have the time. — Craig Brown Decide Copy Share Image
By and large, the artistic establishment disapproved of Margaret Thatcher. — Craig Brown Art Copy Share Image
More often than not, theatre critics bubble with enthusiasm about plays that are, when all is said and done, really pretty average. — Craig Brown About Copy Share Image
For some reason, it is always thrilling to spot your home town in the news. — Craig Brown Always Copy Share Image
Monopoly may also end in tears, but its tensions are cruder, lacking the infinitely subtle shadings of irritation and acrimony provided by… — Craig Brown Also Copy Share Image
![“One evening, at the time of the Six-Day War, I [Christopher Hitchens] had my wicked way with a lovely lady, who had earlier intimated that she did not perhaps find me entirely repulsive. We procured a decent room, as I remember, at the Cadogan Hotel. Perhaps a little flown with wine, I asked her…” quote by Craig Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/cfd/craig-brown-10015_christopher-hitchens_one-evening-at-the-time-of-the-six-day-w_469479.jpg)
![“I [Christopher Hitchens] moved into Mart's sock—where you lived was your 'sock.' Your rug was your 'hair.' Your knee was still your knee: we couldn't think of another word for it. We called our penises our 'willie winkies' and our shared lavatory 'the bog.' There were a lot of brilliantly…” quote by Craig Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/09c/craig-brown-10015_christopher-hitchens_i-christopher-hitchens-moved-into-mart-s_2984781.jpg)
