“George had been surprised by my ability to leave him. He had not seen that in me.” — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
I think writers tend to be experience junkies, and I think they also tend to want to be on the outside looking… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Although I was able to maintain a pleasant expression, I was mentally throwing up in her face. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“Give me down. And give me the Polaroids of the fifty geese that had to die in the process.” — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“Now I can add prostitute to my list of life's accomplishments.” — Augusten Burroughs Accomplishments Copy Share Image
Love is a helium-based emotion; Love always takes the high road. — Augusten Burroughs Emotion Copy Share Image
“I had the same worry that we wouldn't later be able to undo whatever it was we were doing to ourselves.” — Augusten Burroughs Fear Copy Share Image
“The Schnauzer listens to jazz. I listen to jazz because he likes it, and I have even gone to jazz concerts with… — Augusten Burroughs Children Copy Share Image
I could write another collection of personal essays from what has happened to me in the last year alone. I don't seek… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“As I sat on the midnight PVTA bus to Amherst, I scanned the male faces, looking for a potential boyfriend. My standards… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“My brother had very specific likes and dislikes. Basically, he liked anything until it harmed him and then he was wary.” — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Maybe you feel pressure to be positive because so many people rely on your good, fake-positive energy? If that's the case, screw… — Augusten Burroughs Being positive Copy Share Image
“I felt absolutely nothing. It was like a door quickly opened, showing me what horrible feelings I had inside, and then slammed… — Augusten Burroughs Feelings Copy Share Image
“The year I snuck an interracial lesbian couple into the background of an American Airlines commercial, I was feeling particularly flush.” — Augusten Burroughs American Airlines Copy Share Image
“And as soon as I thought this, I tried to think of something else quickly. Because we were so close that I… — Augusten Burroughs Psychology Copy Share Image
“If my mother was odd enough to crave a bubble bath at three in the morning, Dorothy was inventive enough to suggest… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“My grandfather blasted in. "Aw now, hell, carolyn, don't go twisting the boy back up in knots all over again now that… — Augusten Burroughs Leprechauns Copy Share Image
A lot of people can be afraid of the masking because people can misrepresent themselves [in the Internet] and they can pose… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
I'm not going to waste my energy looking into the eyes of someone like the guy who blew my legs off trying… — Augusten Burroughs Energy Copy Share Image
As a young child I had Santa and Jesus all mixed up. I could identify Coke or Pepsi with just one sip,… — Augusten Burroughs Angry Copy Share Image
Acceptance, when it comes, arrives in waves: Listen with your chest. You will feel a pendulum swing within you, favoring one direction… — Augusten Burroughs Acceptance Copy Share Image
I'll always write about what's going on in my life and the reason for that is it's not actually because I'm so… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Most of us have love in our lives. Most of us love other people are are ourselves loved by others. But make… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Decisions are beautiful. They are the evidence of thought and care. Decisions are the polishing cloths of life. — Augusten Burroughs Beautiful Copy Share Image
“Maybe one of my problems is I never depend upon the kindness of strangers.” — Augusten Burroughs Kindness Copy Share Image
Marriage is overdone. As long as there are people, people are going to find it interesting. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“He likes people because he likes to share in conversations. I like people when they have large checks for me.” — Augusten Burroughs Communication Copy Share Image
If you find you require willpower, you aren't ready to lose weight. — Augusten Burroughs Discipline Copy Share Image
“My worth depended on where exactly the decimal was placed among the zeroes.” — Augusten Burroughs Money Copy Share Image
You cannot be a prisoner of your past against your will. Because you can only live in the past inside your mind. — Augusten Burroughs Mind Copy Share Image
It turned out I had always been a smoker. I just hadn't had any cigarettes. — Augusten Burroughs Cigarette Copy Share Image
“Speaking the words aloud so they would exist in the world and begin to become real.” — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
All of us are richer and more fascinating and more complex than we can ever know. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
My mistake was in underestimating the emotional force of a song you have already hear a thousand times. — Augusten Burroughs Emotional Copy Share Image
When you have your health, you have everything. When you do not have your health, nothing else matters at all. — Augusten Burroughs Health Copy Share Image
“Give that mint Milano back, you bitch. If you can't at least be polite, you don't get a treat.” — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
I hate news and information and anything that threatens to puncture the bubble of oblivion in which I live. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
![“A lot of people can be afraid of the masking because people can misrepresent themselves [in the Internet] and they can pose as people they're not. Well, yeah; that's true. That's one side of it. But the other side of it is that it equalizes you and if you happen to be a person who is not equal in…” quote by Augusten Burroughs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8f0/augusten-burroughs-603_damn_a-lot-of-people-can-be-afraid-of-the-mas_3047879.jpg)
