Kill Quote by André Aciman
““I wanted him dead too, so that if I couldn't stop thinking about him and worrying about when would be the next time I'd see him, at least his death would put an end to it. I wanted to kill him myself, even, so as to let him know how much his mere existence had come to bother me, how unbearable his ease with everything and everyone, taking all things in stride, his tireless I'm-okay-with-this-and-that, his springing across the gate to the beach when everyone else opened the latch first, to say nothing of his bathings suits, his spot in paradise , his cheeky Later! , his lip-smacking love for apricot juice. If I didn't kill him, then I'd cripple him for life, so that he'd be with us in a wheelchair and never go back to the States. If he were in a wheelchair, I would always know where he was, and he'd be easy to find. I would feel superior to him and become his master, now that he was crippled. Then it hit me that I could have killed myself instead, or hurt myself badly enough and let him know why I'd done it. If I hurt my face, I'd want him to look at me and wonder why, why might anyone do this to himself, until, years and years later--yes, Later! --he'd finally piece the puzzle together and beat his head against the wall.””
About This Quote
Source Novel: Call Me by Your Name, André Aciman, 2007
A narrator describes obsessive jealousy and violent fantasies toward a rival, revealing deep insecurity and self‑destructive thoughts.
In simple terms: Intense envy leads to dark, harmful daydreams.
Recognize and address toxic jealousy before it escalates.
Themes
Mood
Type
When to use this quote
- relationship rivalry
- personal introspection
- mental health
- conflict resolution
Key Concepts
Questions to Reflect On
- What underlying fears fuel such extreme envy?
- How can one transform jealousy into healthier self‑growth?
The narrative glorifies harmful fantasies without offering constructive coping strategies.