Toaster Quotes

“Your toaster’s a puff.”

— St. John Morris

Never put a sock in a toaster.

— Eddie Izzard

Shawty was hot like a toaster.

— Flo Rida

“Like a toaster!”

— Hedgepig

“Damn, some days I wished I'd been made a toaster.”

— A. Lee Martinez

In the long run, everything is a toaster.

— Bruce Greenwald

If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.

— Clint Eastwood

“I am definitely not a fucking toaster.”

— Jim Chaseley

Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.

— Sam Levenson

Not unlike the toaster, I control darkness.

— Christopher Moore

Burn bread every day boy, no toaster

— Drake

And I keep that toaster, you can come, and be my strudel biiitch

— Lil Wayne

If God wanted me to be a size eight, would he have made Birds Eye Potato Waffles so waffly versatile? Or toastable…

— Grace Dent

If you put a Ferrari sticker on a toaster, it doesn't go any faster.

— Sergio Marchionne

Today's scientific question is: What in the world is electricity? And where does it go after it leaves the toaster?

— Dave Barry

Television is like the American toaster, you push the button and the same thing pops up everytime.

— Alfred Hitchcock

And we've got a toaster and everything. So there is no reason for the wedding.

— Karl Pilkington

If I say so, and I say go. And they go ham, and I lay low. I drop that work off in…

— Meek Mill

The last time I used? What do you mean? I used my toaster this morning.

— Charlie Sheen

Democracy is a gleaming Excalibur - let's not use it just to mend the toaster.

— Russell Brand

I think we've been dulled by capitalism. We're just blobs now - we're so worried about how we can keep paying the…

— Rupert Everett

“My toaster could have a soul,and the walnut grove to the east of my house could be just a bunch of trees…

— A.S. King

You can give poor people this royal wedding to watch and make them feel good about themselves, or you can give them…

— Bo Burnham

Many people continue to think of sharks as man-eating beasts. Sharks are enormously powerful and wild creatures, but youre more likely to…

— Ted Danson

“Too bad my car key won’t start my house. And to answer your unasked question, no you can’t use my toaster like…

— Jarod Kintz

“So, without saying anything to the others, it made its way to the farthest corner of the meadow and began to toast…

— Thomas M. Disch

Blogging. Love it but I'm getting blogged out. You know when you start blogging about your love of toaster ovens its time…

— Jenny McCarthy

“The toaster (lacking real bread) would pretend to make two crispy slices of toast. Or, if the day seemed special in some…

— Thomas M. Disch

Why shouldn't a PC work like a refrigerator or a toaster?

— Walt Mossberg

“I was always a great believer in buttered toast.”

— Frank O'Connor

We did not have a toaster growing up. I never knew what a toaster was, it was only as I got older,…

— Gemma Collins

Does it have to be wireless? Oh, it has to be digital? I was going to say a toaster.

— Joe Jonas

“No matter how rich you are; you still only need one good toaster in the morning to get going.”

— Brendan Nolan

Its almost 2015, I expect a toaster that pops the bread up in a less terrifying way.

— SHEYA

Stack up so much bread I'mma need me a toaster. My partner ride with his chopper, this nigga think he a soldier.

— Young Jeezy

I promise I'll turn you into something useful like a washing machine or a toaster.

— Vegeta

One of my favorite breakfasts is an English muffin, so I need a good toaster.

— Chloe Fineman

I wish computer companies would design a keyboard with a removable crumb tray, kinda like my toaster.

— Anonymous

You can converge a toaster and a refrigerator, but those things are probably not going to be pleasing to the user.

— Tim Cook

“In any case, muffins that are only imaginary aren't liable to get stuck.”

— Thomas M. Disch