Only sad sacks and conformists need things like no kiss on New Year's Eve to remind them to feel lonely. They're as bad as the people who need St. Patty's Day as an excuse to get drunk or Halloween to… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
You have to tell guys to ask you on a date. Smile when you do it - however that works, I'm not 'Cosmo.' But yeah - not a lot of people know how to 'court' anymore, sorry. — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
I've tried open-ended jobs and found myself incredibly unhappy. I don't like the monomania of showing up every day and doing the same thing.… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
When I first started on Twitter, a relative asked, 'Aren't you concerned with giving away your jokes?' I don't think of it that way.… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
I have never been one for musicians. I know girls are supposed to go crazy for frontmen who close their eyes when they sing… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
“Pam (from The Office) is not intimidating, like one of those women who wears makeup and tailored clothes, and has a good job that… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
In all seriousness, I don't get people who need to make a proposal a bigger deal than marriage already is. — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
What else don’t women like besides the Three Stooges? Tom Waits. Being hurt physically or emotionally. — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
I think when it comes to women who write or who fancy ourselves 'hip downtown literati', there is a certain contempt for being overly… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
“But more than anything, as a little girl, I wanted to be exactly like Miss Piggy. She was ma heroine. I was a plucky… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
It’s important to remember that Mark David Chapman really set a lot of trends: such as the trend of celebrities having bodyguards. — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
I look forward to the day when being called 'another Monica Lewinsky' refers to the hard work behind a master's degree in social psychology… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
If you are making money writing, you are doing great. If you can support yourself writing, you are a success. I don't care if… — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
The only thing that's a challenge for me is not working. I get depressed when I'm not in motion. — Julie Klausner Copy Share Image
