Any man will admit if need be that his sight is not good, or that he cannot swim or shoots badly with a rifle, but to touch upon his sense of humour is to give him mortal affront. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
My parents migrated to Canada in 1876, and I decided to go with them. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
You frequently ask, where are the friends of your childhood, and urge that they shall be brought back to you. As far as I am able to learn, those of your friends who are not in jail are still right there in your native village. You point out that they were wont to share your gambols, If so, you are… — Stephen Leacock Copy Share
The parent who could see his boy as he really is, would shake his head and say: 'Willie is no good; I'll sell him. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
It's called political economy because it is has nothing to do with either politics or economy. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
How can you shorten the subject? That stern struggle with the multiplication table, for many people not yet ended in victory, how can you make it less? Square root, as obdurate as a hardwood stump in a pasturenothing but years of effort can extract it. You can't hurry the process. Or pass from arithmetic to algebra; you can't shoulder your… — Stephen Leacock Copy Share
A silk dress in four sections, and shoes with high heels that would have broken the heart of John Calvin. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
Humor may be defined as the kindly contemplation of the incongruities of life, and the artistic expression thereof. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
A lone maple leaf resting on sand Have you ever been out for a late autumn walk in the closing part of the afternoon,… — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
“Suppose a would-be writer can't begin? I really believe there are many excellent writers who have never written because they never could begin. This is especially the case of people of great sensitiveness, or of people of advanced education. Professors suffer most of all from this inhibition. Many of them carry their unwritten books to the grave. They overestimate the… — Stephen Leacock Copy Share
We think of the noble object for which the professor appears tonight, we may be assured that the Lord will forgive any one who… — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
