Religion Quotes by Terry Pratchett

“Religion is not an exact science. Sometimes, of course, neither is science.”

— Terry Pratchett

“Magic is one thing, and reflected-sound-of-underground-spirits is another.”

— Terry Pratchett

“To be frank, I find religion rather offensive.”

— Terry Pratchett

Do you think it's possible for an entire nation to be insane?

— Terry Pratchett

“To tell you the truth, I'm something of an atheist.”

— Terry Pratchett

It was written in some holy book, apparently, so that made it okay, and probably compulsory.

— Terry Pratchett

“Belief, he says. Belief shifts. People start out believing in the god and end up believing in the structure.”

— Terry Pratchett

“What a mess the world was in, Vimes reflected. Constable Visit had told him the meek would inherit it, and what had…

— Terry Pratchett

“A number of religions in Ankh-Morpork still practiced human sacrifice, except that they didn't really need to practice any more because they…

— Terry Pratchett

If complete and utter chaos was lightning, then he'd be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet…

— Terry Pratchett

The power of prayer and faith can heal and bring happiness. The real tragedy is that the people that are helped by…

— Terry Pratchett

The figures looked more or less human. And they were engaged in religion. You could tell by the knives (it's not murder…

— Terry Pratchett

“This Is Religion, Boy. Not Comparison Bloody Shopping! You Shall Not Subject Your God To Market Forces!”

— Terry Pratchett

Voodoo is a very interesting religion for the whole family, even those members of it who are dead.

— Terry Pratchett

“Humans! They lived in a world where the grass continued to be green and the sun rose every day and flowers regularly…

— Terry Pratchett

“Ankh-Morpork is a godless city--' 'I thought it had more than three hundred places of worship?' said Maladict. Strappi stared at him…

— Terry Pratchett

“The Tezuman Empire in the jungle valleys of central Klatch is known for it organic market gardens, its exquisite craftsmanship in obsidian,…

— Terry Pratchett

“One of the biggest religions on Roundworld was founded by a carpenter's son!' Ponder snarled. 'For years, the most powerful person on…

— Terry Pratchett

“The Auditors had tried to understand religion, because so much that made no sense whatsoever was done in its name. But it…

— Terry Pratchett

The Yen Buddhists are the richest religious sect in the universe. They hold that the accumulation of money is a great evil…

— Terry Pratchett

“Other people say: hold on, if he's carrying the entire universe in a sack, right, that means he's carrying himself and the…

— Terry Pratchett

“Maladict had hallucinations, but Wazzer had a certainty you could bend steel around. It was the opposite of a hallucination, somehow. It…

— Terry Pratchett

“An alternative, favored by those of a religious persuasion, was that A’Tuin was crawling from the Birthplace to the Time of Mating,…

— Terry Pratchett

Dwarfs were not a naturally religious species, but in a world where pit props could crack without warning and pockets of fire…

— Terry Pratchett

“Few religions are definite about the size of Heaven, but on the planet Earth the Book of Revelation (ch. XXI, v.16) gives…

— Terry Pratchett

“At the Temple of the Seven-Handed Sek a hasty convocation of priests and ritual heart-transplant artisans agreed that the hundred-span-high statue of…

— Terry Pratchett

“That was a dhlang !" he said. "An evil spirit! The peasants down in the valleys hang up charms against them! But…

— Terry Pratchett

“This was not the time to say “I don’t know.” The brothers had begging, hungry looks, like dogs waiting to be fed.…

— Terry Pratchett

“Vimes, listening with his mouth open, wondered why the hell it was that dwarfs believed that they had no religion and no…

— Terry Pratchett

“People said there had to be a Supreme Being because otherwise how could the universe exist, eh? And of course there clearly…

— Terry Pratchett

Oh, come on. Revelation was a mushroom dream that belonged in the Apocrypha. The New Testament is basically about what happened when…

— Terry Pratchett

One of the things forgotten about the human spirit is that while it is, in the right conditions, noble and brave and…

— Terry Pratchett

You say that you people don’t burn folk and sacrifice people anymore, but that’s what true faith would mean, y’see? Sacrificin’ your…

— Terry Pratchett

“I mean, it's one thing saying you've got the best god, but sayin' it's the only real one is a bit of…

— Terry Pratchett

“And so Mort came at last to the river Ankh, greatest of rivers. Even before it entered the city, it was slow…

— Terry Pratchett

Gods prefer simple, vicious games, where you Do Not Achieve Transcendence but Go Straight To Oblivion; a key to the understanding of…

— Terry Pratchett

“He knew from experience that true and obvious ideas, such as the ineffable wisdom and judgment of the Great God Om, seemed…

— Terry Pratchett

The short conversation that follows eventually led to a tree religion. Its tenet of faith was this: a tree that was a…

— Terry Pratchett

But…but you can’t treat religion as a sort of buffet, can you? I mean, you can’t say yes please, I’ll have some…

— Terry Pratchett

It's no wonder most religions are born in the desert, because when men lay beneath that boundless night sky and look up…

— Terry Pratchett