If you get made fun of working at Pier One Imports, you can't pelt them with poop. — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
Question: What is the white stuff in bird poop? Answer: That is bird poop, too. — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
If you're really a mean person you're going to come back as a fly and eat poop. — Kurt Cobain Copy Share Image
Sometimes on the journey, you step in dog poop. But you don't let the whole journey be about the fact that your… — Iyanla Vanzant Copy Share Image
I tell a lot of fart and poop jokes. I can't help it. I have no filter, and it just comes out. — Tyler Posey Copy Share Image
I use an app called ChoreMonster. The kids earn points for brushing teeth or picking up the dog poop. It's genius. — Julie Bowen Copy Share Image
My life was once whiskey, tears and cigarettes... now it's snot, tears and a color of poop. Bliss. I do miss the… — Pink Copy Share Image
To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with… — Dana Gould Copy Share Image
“A man who can set out in a cab for a fancy-dress ball and not get there is manifestly a poop of… — P. G. Wodehouse Copy Share Image
The last few years of my life have been a little like a long ride in a Poop de Ville with the… — Pat Paulsen Copy Share Image
“News flash, horses poop about fifty pounds of manure a day. That’s per horse. Of course cows poop about three times that,… — Susan Mallery Copy Share Image
Harry is heavily into camping, and every year in the late fall, he makes us all go to Assateague, which is an… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I remember, my very first day at a new school, a bird pooped all down my back. It was like any other… — Cole Sprouse Copy Share Image
The cardinal points are a direct reference to the astrological colures. The Cardinals surround the Pope as the cardinal points surround the… — Michael Tsarion Copy Share Image
Aside from battles, the history of nations seemed to consist of nothing but powerless old poops like myself, heavily medicated and vaguely… — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
If you haven't noticed yet, working sucks. Unless you are a racecar driver or an astronaut or Beyonce, working is completely and… — Aisha Tyler Copy Share Image
All these people talk so eloquently about getting back to good old-fashioned values. Well, as an old poop I can remember back… — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
I would like to apologize for referring to George W. Bush as a 'deserter.' What I meant to say is that George… — Michael Moore Copy Share Image
I'm very happy and being raised Catholic I assume it will end tomorrow. The rug will be pulled out from under me… — Joel McHale Copy Share Image
