People Quotes by Craig Ferguson

Old people really do have a secret though. You wanna know what it is? Luck.

— Craig Ferguson

You know who they're blaming for global warming now? This is true. Fat people.

— Craig Ferguson

People sometimes say to me: "Craig, get out of my garden."

— Craig Ferguson

I'm always a bit shy around evil people...

— Craig Ferguson

With good parody, you have to be smarter that the people you’re parodying.

— Craig Ferguson

Some people watching CNN were so shocked they started rioting. No, I'm kidding. No one watches CNN.

— Craig Ferguson

Sometimes people think you’re smart if you question the status quo, if nothing else.

— Craig Ferguson

Equestrian and sailing are sports for people growing up on the mean streets of Connecticut.

— Craig Ferguson

If I start giving people what they like I'll turn into one of them and I don't want to be one of…

— Craig Ferguson

HD doesn't mean anything to me. It's a technical thing. It's like demographics. A lot of people know about it.

— Craig Ferguson

People talk to old people like they're children.'Oh you're very old aren't you?' Yeah I'm old. I'm not stupid.

— Craig Ferguson

Ocean's 13 is all about cool people having a good time, and who doesn't want to see that? Well you, apparantly, 'cause…

— Craig Ferguson

My job is to find the politicians and the presidents and the pompous people who are telling other people how to live,…

— Craig Ferguson

I've got mixed feelings about poetry cause done well poetry is fantastic. But not many people are capable of doing it well.…

— Craig Ferguson

I used to believe, like many people who come from poor backgrounds, that it gave me an edge, but I think that's…

— Craig Ferguson

There is a new bill in the Senate that is upsetting a lot of people. This bill would give the President the…

— Craig Ferguson

There are rumors that there is a John Edwards sex tape. People say it's twenty minutes of Edwards caressing and stroking...And that's…

— Craig Ferguson

Cannabis always made me paranoid; I felt like people were watching me. And now I'm sober, and I've got this talk show…

— Craig Ferguson

It never occurred to them that God may have provided the world with a vast array of very brainy medical types for…

— Craig Ferguson

It's tricky turning a book into a movie. Sometimes people love the book so much that no adaptation lives up to what…

— Craig Ferguson

Some people take the spelling bee very seriously. These people are called "parents of children in the spelling bee." They're trying to…

— Craig Ferguson

He was in awe of the thirst that people had for someone to tell them that everything was going to be all…

— Craig Ferguson

So far rich people have been very quiet about the possibility of getting taxes raised on them, but that doesn't mean they…

— Craig Ferguson

You know, where I come from, an antique, to be called an antique, it has to be at least a hundred years…

— Craig Ferguson

During the cold war, West Berlin was an exclave - a tiny outpost of liberalism surrounded by people who want to crush…

— Craig Ferguson

If you watch cooking shows on cable, they have lots of British people. Because when you think good cooking, you immediately think…

— Craig Ferguson

I don't know why some people get worked up about gay people marrying. It's not gay people who are ruining the sanctity…

— Craig Ferguson

People spend thousands of dollars trying to keep their teeth straight. I just hope we can live in a world where we…

— Craig Ferguson

I think people are as individual as snowflakes, they kinda look alike but no two are the exactly the same, and all…

— Craig Ferguson

It's very interesting to know what people are doing while you're working on late-night television.

— Craig Ferguson

Much of television has been homogenized in the desire to avoid annoying or upsetting people.

— Craig Ferguson

Why do people do things that they fear? It may be that the fear contains information. Something can be interesting if you…

— Craig Ferguson

“You can never talk religion on network TV. It makes too many people angry. You can talk about sex.”

— craig ferguson

I don't see my show as a stepping stone to something else like some people, who get a job then have a…

— Craig Ferguson

People are saying that Anderson Cooper could be the new Oprah. And then these people are struck by lightning.

— Craig Ferguson

Mark Zuckerberg was named Time's Person of the Year. I'm sorry if you don't recognize the name. A magazine is something people…

— Craig Ferguson

A lot of people come to L.A. looking for something. What I came here for, I realize now, is to be okay…

— Craig Ferguson

Even though it's warm here in L.A., people still have to wear layers - at least until their plastic surgery heals.

— Craig Ferguson

You know who sang at Rush Limbaugh's wedding? Elton John! According to Rush, gay people can sing at weddings. Just not their…

— Craig Ferguson

I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn't.

— Craig Ferguson