“Bad questions at employment interviews: "Is your drug test graded on a curve?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“May fireworks fill your heart and independence be your way of life.” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“How about a TV show about vampire plastic surgeons called, "Suck and Tuck"?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Malcontents who would dissent to paying rent are often bent on bad intent!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I made a candle out of earwax so I could listen better in the dark.” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“If you sleep with one eye open are your dreams only half as good as everyone elses?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Headstones: What I asked was, "Would you MARRY me?!!" "This time I'll count to one hundred and you hide." "OK, It's not… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“If I were a candy bar I’d want to be a snicker, because then I’d have the last laugh!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I flunked out of mime school. I could never hear what the instructor was saying!!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“While walking with a British coach. Why do you chuckle every time we walk by the theater that is showing "Free Willy"?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Has anyone else noticed that most dreams happen while you're asleep? Makes it a lot harder to remember the details...” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“My oldest son used to say his stomach had angries when he felt sick. I always pictured an all night fight club… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“ http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1... This is a link to my first kick starter project called "Magic of the Trees” — neil leckman Copy Share Image
“Sure, ask a question, fire away, but remember, just because we answer doesn't mean we care. We all have our own problems,… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Yesterday I fell completely off the face of the earth Contemplating life, light and love in the darkness of the void Strangely… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Overheard vampire conversation. "Is that Ophelia?" "yep" "She doesn't look well" "Ever since she drank from that hemophiliac everything just goes right… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“One of the joys of being a grandparent is giving your grandchild caffeinated sugary drinks late in the day, and sending them… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Life is complex and prone to being pedantic Always little things crawl, flutter and creep in. Nesting in cracks in our psyches… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“On moonless nights in haunted hollow The tongues of beasts, men's blood do swallow Shape shifting shadows that soon will fade Leaving… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I had a million things running through my mind the other day. Suddenly I realized I didn't know half of them!!” — Neil Leckman, Wurms Copy Share Image
“I've always been afraid that someone would steal my identity some day and be more successful at being me than I am!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“They kept yelling at me to pay attention during school, since education hasn't panned out for me can I get a refund,… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I think what I need to do is stay awake while I'm sleeping so I can see what I'm dreaming better!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Pharmacy drive-up window: "Could I have your address?" "Well, you could, but that would be one hell of a coincidence!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges soaking up so much water.” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I am open to comments, I accept with with all humility, or at least what I can muster at short notice.” — Neil leckman Copy Share Image
“The other day I was trying to enjoy the sunset of my mind when I realized we were on daylight saving time!!” — Neil Leckman, Wurms Copy Share Image
“I like to provide American humor for British soccer coaches when possible. During keeper practice I'll offer to stand behind the goal… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“If I have a pocket fun of rainbows am I an optimist, or a guy with wet pants and really large pockets?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I like to check my pulse before I get out of bed. No point getting up if I'm already dead!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Why don't they make chocolate horses for Easter with a belly full of gummy bears. Educational and sweet!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Some people like to push my buttons!!! I just wish they would give them back...” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
