I failed to get into drama school, and my best friend told me I should do stand-up instead. I was always doing gags and voices, so he booked a gig for me without telling me. I only had four days… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
Jews, I know you're God's chosen people and the rest of us are just 'whatever', but when Israel behaves like a violent, psychopathic bully… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
All my shows are therapy, trying to navigate interesting subjects so I can work them out and to be honest and say some things… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
“If Pac-Man had affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in dark rooms, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.” — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share
“We humans who art on Earth Humanity is special Our kingdom has come Do what we innately know to be right On earth, because that's all there is Share the bread we have Try not to screw up When others screw up, understand We can't have everything that tempts us Deliver ourselves from evil Because this is it, the Earth,… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share
I'm more pompous and self-assured and determined that if - you know - if the truth can be told so as to be understood,… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
I've spent a lot of very happy times in Edinburgh as a result of playing virtually every festival since 1996. It's also a beautiful… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
“I'd like to start this week with a request, and this one goes out to the followers of the three Abrahamic religions: the Muslims, Christians, and Jews. It's just a little thing, really, but do you think that when you've finished smashing up the world and blowing each other to bits and demanding special privileges while you do it, do… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share
Catholicism has the clerical equivalent to a nut allergy - even a small exposure to change, and the whole thing will go into anaphylactic… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
I'd lie in bed in my dormitory and grab at bits of my body, wanting to tear them off... I was so large by… — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
I find myself by default an atheist but fairly unhappily so. It would be bloody marvelous if there was a god. — Marcus Brigstocke Copy Share Image
