“Yeah, about a guy who was jogging by you this morning. You said his penis was swaying like the wrecking ball in Miley Cyrus’s music video and he needed to wear man panties rather than free-ballin’ it.” — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“She really needs to unclench because the sensation of her butt trying to slice off my finger is completely freaking me out right now. “Debra, I think it might help if you relax a little,” I suggest, praying for the throbbing in my finger to stop from lack of circulation. “How can I relax when you have your finger up… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share
“Gah, I bet she secretly takes pictures of him and puts them on her inspiration board of men she wants to f*ck. I bet… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“Can we take a moment of silence for Jack? That rotten, horse-faced Rose could have inched to the side to make room for him.… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“There is a difference. Loving someone and being in love with someone. You can love anyone that touches your soul in a way you’ll… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“Kids are spoiled these days. Tootsie Rolls are gold. Fuck the rest of the candy. Tootsie rolls are where it's at.” — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“Soon, droves of children start to show up, keeping us rather busy. We start tallying up the number of Trolls, Batmans, Lego men, and princesses we see. The most popular costume? Batman and Superwoman with the fabrics and accessories varying from child to child. But my favorite so far is the girl who dressed as Little Debbie, but then again,… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share
“You can’t trust a man with a curly mustache. It just screams deviant.” — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“When we get closer, he pushes out both of the chairs across from him. He nods at them and says, “Take a seat.” I raise an eyebrow at him. “Am I going to have to woo you before I get my slice?” He smiles over the pizza that he’s about to bite into. “Yeah, I do believe you’re going to… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share
“Yes, that’s right, you ladies are fine, you’re beautiful, you’re more than just a smooth piece of skin with a beating heart. You’re women, damn it, you have the power to take down any man you want to, and do you know why?” I pointed at them and then gripped my tits and crotch. “Because we hold the ticket to… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share
“You never realize how much you need touch until it’s given to you as a surprise gift.” — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“Be kind. Be Courageous. Do good. Own you. And Prove your existence.” — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
“I was not checking you out," she protests. If she added a foot stomp to that little denial train, I would have hopped on… — Meghan Quinn Copy Share Image
