Steve Dallas...a frat-boy lawyer who I knew in school. He's never written me. I suspect he was shot by an annoyed girlfriend, which has saved me many legal fees. — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
“Neither knew it at the time, but a line had been crossed that could not be uncrossed- a running leap over a chasm of… — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
“Just the usual formality before the chaos begins. Like playing the National Anthem before a Cubs game.” — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
Despite what they tell you, there are simply no moral absolutes in a complex world. — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
And that's why any of my picture books exist: They all seem to be built backwards from a simple, emotionally optimistic story beat. — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
I could draw Bloom County with my nose and pay my cleaning lady to write it, and I'd bet I wouldn't lose 10% of… — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
Dear Lord, I've been asked, nay commanded, to thank Thee for the Christmas turkey before us... a turkey which was no doubt a lively,… — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
Liberal, shmiberal. That should be a new word. Shmiberal: one who is assumed liberal, just because he's a professional whiner in the newspaper. If… — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
I'd be a Libertarian, if they weren't all a bunch of tax-dodging professional whiners. — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
Cartooning is about deconstruction: you gotta tear something down to make a joke. — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
I knew 'Mars Needs Moms! ' would be a movie seconds after the title came to mind. Similarly, I also knew that my daughter… — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
I happen to think nearly everybody - especially those one might find in the odd issue of 'People' magazine, including me - is frightfully… — Berkeley Breathed Copy Share Image
