You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
I'm very lucky in that I've gotten to do a lot of things. But if you ever put a gun to my… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
Country music is about new love and it's about old love. It's about gettin' drunk and gettin' sober. It's about leavin' and… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
I would love for someone to offer me a serious part in something. I don't know if I could even pull it… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
That's just something instinctual within men. We always feel like we've got to protect our stuff. Even if it's not worth protecting,… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
I'm an outdoor nut. If I'm not working, I'm on a tractor on my farm, hunting, fishing or climbing a mountain. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your daughter's Barbie's Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your 'huntin dog' cost more than the truck you drive him around in. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of a weird set to try to put together. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
You might be a redneck if... your high school basketball game got rained out. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
We sing about God because we believe in Him. We are not trying to offend anybody, but the evidence that we have seen of… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
Hell, when I was in high school, a "drive-by shooting" meant somebody had their rear end hanging out a car window! — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges; he got guys off the fishing docks. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
Women in bed are like Diesel engines. What I mean by that is, it may take them a while to get going, but when… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share
