'I don't say a Zionist must be insane,' said President Weizmann, 'but it helps if he is.' — George Mikes Copy Share Image
The English take everything with an exquisite sense of humour. They are only offended if you tell them that they have no… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
In England the boy pats his adored one on the back and says softly, "I don't object, you know." If he is… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
I asked many friends if Australian anti-intellectualism was still a living force and they all told me it was. If you are… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
Was he joking? Was he being sarcastic? Aggressive? Impertinent? Or just courteous? There was no telling from his impassive face. What a… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
On the Continent there is one topic which should be avoided-the weather; in England, if you do not repeat the phrase "Lovely… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
Australians are decent people with the right instincts and they wish everybody well; but if all is not well, it is none… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
Although the rudiments of snobbery are there, its finer developments are basically alien to the Australian soul - that is, if Australians… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
If it is gay, ribald and lascivious night-life you are after, Israel is not the place for you. The night clubs you… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
If somebody tells you an obviously untrue story, on the Continent you would remark, "You are a liar, Sir, and a rather… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
Japan suffered terribly from the atomic bomb but never adopted a pose of moral superiority, implying: 'We would never have done it!'… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
You must not refuse any additional cups of tea under the following circumstances: if it is hot; if it is cold; if… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
The British suffer from a most unfortunate superiority complex - unjustified even under Victoria and most certainly hopelessly out-of-date today. — George Mikes Copy Share
Remember that those five hundred words an average Englishman uses are far from being the whole vocabulary of the language. You may learn another… — George Mikes Copy Share
English humor resembles the Loch Ness Monster in that both are famous but there is a strong suspicion that neither exists. — George Mikes Copy Share
“Before you are admitted to British citizenship you are not even considered a natural human being. I looked up the word natural (na’tural) in… — George Mikes Copy Share
“In the last century, when a wicked and unworthy subject annoyed the Sultan of Turkey or the Czar of Russia, he had his head… — George Mikes Copy Share
“While all this goes on, the English remain staunch believers in equality. Equality is a notion the English have given to humanity. Equality means… — George Mikes Copy Share
I asked many friends if Australian anti-intellectualism was still a living force and they all told me it was. If you are above average… — George Mikes Copy Share
“Mr S. got angry. ‘Yes, I do have a son. He’s a good-for-nothing. A dead loss.’ I couldn’t ask which prison he was in,… — George Mikes Copy Share
“I have been told that my above-described theory is all wrong and is only due to my Central European conceit, because the English do… — George Mikes Copy Share
Rich people (in Australia) have swimming pools in their gardens but, at least, they do swim in them. — George Mikes Copy Share
“An average English house combines all the curses of civilisation with the vicissitudes of life in the open. It is all right to have… — George Mikes Copy Share
Australia objects to the mini-skirt not on moral but on economic grounds. Australians are no prudes and the lovely, healthy, sporty Australian girls have… — George Mikes Copy Share
The Art of Conversation could not die in Australia; it never lived. Television did not kill it; there was nothing there to kill. — George Mikes Copy Share
