“Vimes awoke with a noseful of camel. There are far worse awakenings, but not as many as you might think.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Colon looked awkward, as if the bunched underwear of the past was tangling itself in the crotch of recollection.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“I thought dwarfs loved gold," said Angua. "They just say that to get it into bed.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Vimes woke in damp and utter darkness with sand under his cheek. Some parts of his body reported for duty, others protested… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Vimes was already lost. Oh, there was the sun, but that was just a direction . He could feel it on the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The horsemen came closer. Vimes was not good at horsemen. Something in him resented being addressed by anyone eight feet above the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“I'm sure the Bursar would not agree with those figures," said the Senior Wrangler sourly. "That is so,' said Ponder, "but I'm… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“It was funny how people were people everywhere you went, even if the people concerned weren't the people the people who made… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Dwarfs are very attached to gold. Any highwayman demanding 'Your money or your life' had better bring a folding chair and packed… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“I wonder what's the difference between ordinary councillors and privy councillors?" wondered the merchant aloud. The assassin scowled at him. "I think,"… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
It was possibly the most circumspect advance in the history of military maneuvers, right down at the bottom end of the scale… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Vimes stuck his helmet under his arm, smoothed back his hair, and knocked. He'd considered asking Sargent Colon to accompany him, but… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“And visitors say: how does such a big city exist? What keeps it going? Since it's got a river you can chew,… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Look down, your grace," said Skimmer. "Mhm, mhm." Vimes realized he could feel the faintest prick of a knife blade on his… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Letters rarely got written in that mine. Work stopped and the whole clan had sat around in respectful silence as his pen… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“A dwarf who can't get the hang of metal? That must be pretty unique." "Pretty rare, sir. But I was quite good… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Someone broke from the scrum and, punching and kicking, staggered towards the Klatchian goal. "Isn't that man your butler?" said Ahmed. "Yes."… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The barricade was taking some while to dismantle. Chair legs and planks and bedsteads and doors and baulks of timber had settled… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“His Greatness the King Pteppicymon XXVIII, Lord of the Heavens, Charioteer of the Wagon of the Sun, Steersman of the Barque of… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“ Click. The salamander flared, etching the room with searing white light and dark shadows. Otto screamed. He fell to the floor,… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“How big a war?" "A worse one than the one fifty years ago, I expect," said Cheery. "I don't recall people talking… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“You see," said Colon, "thieves are organized here. I mean, it's official . They're allowed a certain amount of thieving. Not that… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Oh, good grief," said Vimes. "Look, it's quite simple, man. I was expected to go "At last, alcohol!", and chugalug the lot… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Vimes shook some lather off the blade. "Hah! I bet they have. Tell me, Willikins, did you fight much when you were… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“It was because he wanted there to be conspirators. It was much better to imagine men in some smoky room somewhere, made… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“That was a dhlang !" he said. "An evil spirit! The peasants down in the valleys hang up charms against them! But… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“And, er, these stories about you..." "Oh, all true. Most of them. A bit of exaggeration, but mostly true." "The one about… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The forest of Skund was indeed enchanted, which was nothing unusual on the Disc, and was also the only forest in the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“People look down on stuff like geography and meteorology, and not only because they're standing on one and being soaked by the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The other two entered the room. Vimes gave his men his usual look of resigned dismay. "My squad," he mumbled. "Fine body… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“You're not suggesting that Vetinari tucks into a nice rat every day?" said Angua. "I've heard he uses rats as spies, so… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The three thieves looked around. As their eyes grew accustomed to the gloom, they received a general impression of armourality, with strong… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Look, sir, I know Angua. She's not the useless type. She doesn't stand there and scream helplessly. She makes other people do… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The street was full of animals, milling around uncertainly. When animals are in a state of uncertainty they get nervous, and the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Lawn looked down at his patient. "In the words of the philosopher Sceptum, the founder of my profession: am I going to… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“How do you spell 'contravention'?" said Carrot, turning over a page. "I don't," said Nobby, pushing through the crowds.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Silk stockings. With garters . Well, they were out. There were a lot of things he'd do for Sybil, but if garters… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“We need to borrow your boat," said Vimes. "Bugger off!" "I'm choosing to believe that was a salty nautical expression meaning 'Why,… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“When new students tried an experiment that was particularly successful in terms of explosive force, the result was often a cross between… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“This one’s mental.’ ‘Eccentric.’ ‘What’s the difference?’ ‘A bag of cash.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“But I did not return until half past four this morning and I distinctly remember stubbing my toe on the stairs. I am as… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“The universe contains any amount of horrible ways to be woken up, such as the noise of the mob breaking down the front door,… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“Someone broke from the scrum and, punching and kicking, staggered towards the Klatchian goal. "Isn't that man your butler?" said Ahmed. "Yes." "One of… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
It's an interesting fact that fewer than 17 % of Real cats end their lives with the same name they started with. Much family… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
Either dragons should exist completely or fail to exist at all, he felt. A dragon only half-existing was worse than the extremes. — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“Magrat wondered what it was like, spending your whole life doing something you didn’t want to do. Like being dead, she considered, only worse,… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
A hardback's harder at Christmas time because that's a good hardback buying time. — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“There were more old people. The world was full of them,' said the wizard. 'Yes, I know. And now it's full of young people.… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“Hobson was big and heavyset, but not exactly fat; he was probably what you’d get if you shaved a bear.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“There is a night that never comes to an end… The clock of the world turns under its own shadow. Midnight is a moving… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“You'd like Freedom, Truth, and Justice, wouldn't you, Comrade Sergeant?' said Reg encouragingly. 'I'd like a hard-boiled egg,' said Vimes, shaking the match out.… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
“You are not apprehensive, are you? I can't detect no trace of fear none whatsoever Roomy cranium all possible videos of all possible outcomes… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share
