Humor Quotes by Richelle Mead

My commentary's hilarious, not witty.

— Richelle Mead

“Damn, my word of the night”

— Richelle Mead

“A dream doesn't mean anything. I dreamed the other night that I went riding on a dinosaur.”

— Richelle Mead

I'd seen weirder things than a haunted shoe, but not many.

— Richelle Mead

I’d said it before and meant it: Alive or undead, the love of my life was a badass.

— Richelle Mead

This college would probably have the same problem as the last one did." I frowned, "What's that?" "Homework.

— Richelle Mead

“You might be surrounded by clouds, but you'll be like sunshine to me.”

— Richelle Mead

“Hope had gone so white, it was a wonder someone didn't accuse her of being a Strigoi.”

— Richelle Mead

You look too pretty to be useful." "Truer words were never spoken.

— Richelle Mead

“I had a standing agreement with god. I'd agree to believe in him, barely, so long as he let me sleep in…

— Richelle Mead

“Throughout my training we always had a mantra; They come first. If I had really and truly screwed up my future, I'd…

— Richelle Mead

“I neither require nor desire your gratitude, mistress. I want nothing in these worlds save your death." Volusian to Eugenie”

— Richelle Mead

“You used nunchucks on a moose?" Wolfe got a haunted look in his eyes. "I used all sorts of things on that…

— Richelle Mead

“Dimitri: She might be wild and disrespectful, but if she has potential— Rose: "Wild and disrespecful? Who the hell are you anyway?…

— Richelle Mead

“What's up?" I asked. You tell me," he said. "You were the one about ready to start making out with Adrian." It…

— Richelle Mead

“Adrian, we hashed this out! Everything's gone perfectly until now. Why would you even think about deviating from the plan?' 'Um, because…

— Richelle Mead

“How do you feel right now?" "I hurt like hell." "You'll feel worse tomorrow." "So?" "So, better get a jump on this…

— Richelle Mead

“I'm serious. She asked me what my greatest strength was. I said getting along with people." "That's not bad," I admitted. "Then…

— Richelle Mead

“I sent a quick text to Adrian: I have a hickey! You can’t ever kiss me again. I honestly hadn’t expected him…

— Richelle Mead

“You might not believe this, but there is no one like her at this school." "Oh I believe it," I said, thinking…

— Richelle Mead

“Well, let's see. Guardians spend all their time watching out for others, risking their lives, and wearing bad shoes. Me? I have…

— Richelle Mead

“Nothing will get you anywhere with me," I exclaimed. "I don't know about that." He put on an introspective look that was…

— Richelle Mead

“Your... Your aura. It's... amazing. It's shining. I mean, it always shines, but today... Well I've never seen anything like it. I…

— Richelle Mead

“The [bowling] ball flew out jerkily, sailed about four feet, hit the lane with a loud crack , and then promptly entered…

— Richelle Mead

“He stared at me for several heavy seconds and then laughed—though there wasn't much humor in it. "You know what's great? You'reserious.…

— Richelle Mead

“Are you okay with what we ordered?” Angeline asked him. “You didn’t pipe up with any requests.” Neil shook his head, face…

— Richelle Mead

“She's talking about when Dimitri was very young, how he used to always beg her and her friends to let him play…

— Richelle Mead

“You know what would help?" I asked, not meeting his eyes. "Hmm?" "If you turned off this crap music and put on…

— Richelle Mead

“[High angel] Carter's fucked-up sense of humor in action.' [The angel] Lucinda flushed deep crimson. 'How can you use such language so…

— Richelle Mead

“We could, you know, go out for hot dogs. Don’t worry—they’re not actually dogs. It’s just a name. They’re these meat things…

— Richelle Mead

“Of course, now I had the problem of communicating what I needed. Marlen was still beating on the door, and Dimitri would…

— Richelle Mead

“Because I can't help doing it," he said with a shrug. "And hey, if I keep loving you, maybe you'll eventually crack…

— Richelle Mead

“My muscles informed me they did not want to go through any more exercise today. So I suggest that maybe he should…

— Richelle Mead

“That shower thing was hilarious," he said when I finished. "It was irresponsible! Why can't anyone see that?" "But that bitch had…

— Richelle Mead

“ah, my daughter", he said. "eighteen and already you've been accused of murdered, aided felons, amd required a death count higher than…

— Richelle Mead

“Sorry,ʺ she said, her face shining with joy when she saw me. ʺShould have put a sock on the door. Didnʹt realize…

— Richelle Mead

“I think you smoke them so you have something to do while thinking up your next witty line." He choked on the…

— Richelle Mead

“Abe held my gaze a bit longer and then broke into an easy smile. ʺOf course, of course. This is a family…

— Richelle Mead