“She knew a cutting, incisive, withering and above all a self-evident answer existed. It was just that, to her extreme annoyance, she… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
(speaking about ron being made a prefect) You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family! What are Fred and I?… — JK Rowling Copy Share Image
Billy Pilgrim had a theory about diaries. Women were more likely than men to think that their lives had sufficient meaning to… — Dean Koontz Copy Share Image
“How's your foot?” Hadrian asked. “It hurts.” “He had a good hold.” “Bit right through my boot.” “Yeah, that looked painful.” “So… — Michael J. Sullivan Copy Share Image
“Remember the Hottentots?" asked James. "They've become the Khoi now, which means that the Germans will have to retire that wonderful word… — Alexander McCall Smith Copy Share Image
I think if you write humor, then people don't - you know - they don't give you that much credit. They tend… — David Sedaris Copy Share Image
“The more you read, the better you get at it; the better you get at it, the more you like it; and… — Jim Trelease Copy Share Image
I went to a pizzeria. The guy gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart with what… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
Great use they have, when in the hands Of one like me, who understands, Who understands the time and place, The person,… — Charles Churchill Copy Share Image
I mean, teenage girls and their fathers don't have a lot in common, but when you add something like comedy into the… — Stephanie Beatriz Copy Share Image
Thomas, my 15-year-old, is effectively my editor, I've always trusted his voice, more than anybody, on the strip for years. He has… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
“He pats his way around the bed and slides back in. 'Ow,' he says. 'Yes?' 'My belt. Would it be weird...' I’m… — Stephanie Perkins Copy Share Image
“I'm not sure that my existence will be made any brighter by hearing about others who live in darkness. But I suppose… — Jonas Jonasson Copy Share Image
I think that crowdfunding has become such a powerful tool to tell stories that might not find financing otherwise - like a… — Kit Williamson Copy Share Image
“Your kids pissing you off is an inborn instinct. It's nature's way of getting you to kick them out when they turn… — Dakota Dawn Copy Share Image
Stand-up can take you in so many different places, man. So many doors can be opened up from stand-up comedy, and the… — Kevin Hart Copy Share Image
“I'm a shreddermouf, aren't I?' 'I was afraid of that,' said Tansy. He was going to keep her in his larder until… — Elizabeth Kay Copy Share Image
“This is a bawdy tale. Herein you will find gratuitous shagging, murder, spanking, maiming, treason, and heretofore unexplored heights of vulgarity and… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Can there really be a form of verse where all that counts is the number of syllables in a line? No patterning… — Stephen Fry Copy Share Image
I think you gotta have some humor [in your story]. People gotta have a moment to laugh and feel that it's not… — RZA Copy Share Image
“Cassius shook his head and sighed "I want to have just one conversation with you that doesn't required GPS to navigate. I'm… — Gabrielle Evans Copy Share Image
So much of comedy is feeling comfortable with the point of view coming at you. So I understand it. There's people who… — Scott Aukerman Copy Share Image
Before I even knew what stand up was, I tried to make people laugh at school because that was how I made… — Bill Burr Copy Share Image
You're on stage and because stand-up comedy is one of the few meritocracies in the entertainment industry, there's some kind of -… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
“Before he sat down, my internal heat-seekers sensed what was coming my way: deep blue eyes that melted girls like Velveeta in… — Natalie Standiford Copy Share Image
When I came to Chicago, I didn't even know what improvisation meant, as far as pertaining to comedy. I knew about Second… — Matt Besser Copy Share Image
“...hanging out does not make one an artist. A secondhand wardrobe does not make one an artist. Neither do a hair-trigger temper,… — David Rakoff Copy Share Image
There is this awkward discomfort when you're doing comedy on camera because people aren't allowed to laugh so that they can get… — Patti Harrison Copy Share Image
“Humans will market anything to make a fucking profit. Religion, war, love, hate, sex, violence, pain, humor, emotion... all for fucking paper.… — James Wheeler Copy Share Image
“He's probably somewhere right now eating a Big-N-Tasty. The man has a coffee pot, a microwave, AND a mini refrigerator in his… — Piper Faust Copy Share Image
“I wish we could make out in your bed." Noah sighed. "As do I, but I'm afraid we have ritual burning to… — Michelle Hodkin Copy Share Image
“Will put his hand on Nico's shoulder. "Nico, we need to have another talk about your people skills." "Hey, I'm just stating… — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
I think physical comedy is an amazing asset because it tells a story that's more universal than just language and dialogue. I… — Josh Gad Copy Share Image
Any type of humor can be transferred to the screen, as long as there's clarity. The audience wants to know just what… — Steve Martin Copy Share Image
The quality of my songs will get through to people. They are good songs. Lyrically, some of them are interesting: there's stories,… — Gilbert O'Sullivan Copy Share Image
You don't see a wonderful shot in a comedy. Why? Because they don't want to distract you from what matters, which is… — Fede Alvarez Copy Share Image
“Mr. Rochester never courted Jane Eyre," Tessa pointed out. "No, he dressed up as a woman and terrified the poor girl out… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
“God works in mysterious ways, baby, and there is never more evidence of this than when your life is going along fairly… — Suzanne Finnamore Copy Share Image
“Neil Mars?! I could blame him for having killer looks but he could not be faulted for this. He couldn’t have chosen… — Rucy Ban Copy Share Image
“From Olsen's Nation: "Through the power of our diplomacy, a world that was once divided about how to deal with Iran’s nuclear… — Randy Quarles Copy Share Image