“But it has perks -- personal pride, financial security, and the feeling of accomplishment and control that comes when you just swap in a new toilet paper roll rather than resorting to fast-food napkins.” — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
“Wise random strangers at bars are modern-day Oracles of Delphi, except drunk and sometimes leaving abruptly when it's their turn for karaoke.” — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
“If we were all our most real and raw selves every moment of the day things would be just awful. The world would be… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
“Be the kind of friend that you want to have. This is what it all boils down to. Listen when they bitch. Tell them… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
One of the most jolting days of adulthood comes the first time you run out of toilet paper. Toilet paper, up until this point,… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
“But the fact is people who always have at least a quarter tank of gas and refill the tank as soon as it dips… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
“There's an incredible Tupac song that does not mince words in its hook: "Motherfucker, watch ya mouth." Granted, Tupac is issuing threats to associates… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
It is hard to convince people of this, but oatmeal truly is miraculous. It gives you an amazing amount of energy, like cocaine. — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
A slightly modified version of the Serenity Prayer: Lord, grant me the serenity to ignore the assholes I cannot avoid; The luck to avoid… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
“Your parents, presumably, love you very much and think you are perhaps the most adorable, talented thing ever to prance upon this earth. Your… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
Meaning to send a thank-you note but then not doing it is exactly the same as never thinking to send one - that person… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
You're a grown up, and you get to decide what behaviors affect you for five minutes versus what behaviors change you as a person. — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
“But it has perks -- personal pride, financial security, and the feeling of accomplishment and control that comes when you just swap in a… — Kelly Williams Brown Copy Share Image
