If you're not working on trying to be mine then you shouldn't be worrying about who's consuming my time. — Amanda Copy Share Image
I am so ready for Christmas movies and Christmas Songs and snow and all that other sappy amazing Winter stuff... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You think I'm not online. But I'm always here. Even if I'm not posting. I'm here. Scrolling. Judging. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Letting the water run down my arms when I'm in the shower so it looks like I'm shooting water out of my… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Compromise: The art of dividing the cake in a way that makes everyone believe they got the largest piece. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The cure for aids could be written somewhere in the Terms and Conditions, and we would never know. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Honey, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex! It's also the food preparation. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Do you ever just stare at really attractive people and think 'How the fuck does someone look like that?!' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Looking back on your old Facebook pictures and thinking What the hell was I doing omg embarrassing eww — Kand3n Copy Share Image
You posted a status on your friend's Facebook when he wasn't looking? Please tell me how great of a hacker you are. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
To steal ideas from one person, would be plagiarism, to steal ideas from many is called research. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The blonde was always careful to remove her watch before putting on bug spray because she didn't want it to kill the… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
All this makeup is hiding how certain girls really look. Smokey eyes,thick ass eyebrows. Gotta take these b*tches swimmin on the first… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The NFL is boring, the NBA is disintegrating, baseball is totally predictable. Maybe we do need the XFL. Maybe we need Nude… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
There are no relationship problems that can't be solved through suitable application of high explosives. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You're lesbian? You're not attracted to men...but you're dating girls that looks like men. That makes complete sense! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Never go bungee jumping, a rubber breaking is the reason why I am in this world, and sure as hell not going… — Uknown Copy Share Image
Okay bitch I'm confused... So a 1000 quotes say, if he doesn't treat u well leave. And another 1000 says its all… — Lekoma Precious Napo Copy Share Image
10-year-old girls crying because they broke up with their boyfriends. When I was 10 I cried when I missed the morning cartoons. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Everyone want a cute and perfect relationship but some people just don't know how to keep it real — Christine Copy Share Image
For those who woke up in a Fussy mood this morning do me a favor, punch your spouse in their fucking face. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Never use google translate because it gives you a verb, but use a dictionary cuz it gives you a knowledge — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I see no reason why having a body with curves instead of muscles should bar me from knowing how to work on… — Simi Ngr Copy Share Image
Truly love you endlessly. Every day without you is like a book without pages. I love you, I will always do, for… — F Abahusain Copy Share Image
Talking about Valentine's Day. Couples walking around, laughing and cuddling each other... And I'm like: Bitch, *myself* will buy me a chocolate! — Anna Dawn Copy Share Image
It's bad enough to steal you fb status but when they do and they get more likes then you that's just messed… — Mario Tomasello Copy Share Image
Seeing an argument on Facebook, sitting there refreshing the page and thinking, 'Oh, this is going to be good!' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Ladies don't ask for much. They just want shoes, diamonds, less work, free money & a perfect man. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Just because there's plenty of fish in the sea doesn't mean u have the proper equipment 2 catch a keeper~ — DeAngelo Stokes Copy Share Image
If I post a status and you automatically assume it's about you...Don't blame your guilty conscience on me. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hate when I'm staring at nothing in particular, and then realize I'm looking right at somebody. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If a woman asks you a question, its better to tell her the truth , chances are shes asking you because she… — Becca Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you are yelling at someone and you mess up a word. And it ruins the seriousness! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Its funny how I remember all the lyrics to every song from the 90²s, but forget why I walked into the next… — Punkinhead Abhishek Copy Share Image
The best thing in life is finding someone who knows all your flaws, mistakes, & weaknesses, & still thinks you're completely amazing. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Whoever said technology will replace paper has obviously never tried to wipe their butt with an iPad. — Cyberbilly Copy Share Image
That akward moment when you talking about someone and then they just show up out of know where wanting to join the… — Jaimie White Copy Share Image
Instead of cheating on someone just break up with them instead of getting caught n never having a chance with them never… — Bigboyalweezy Copy Share Image
If my jokes offend you: 1. Im sorry. 2. It wont happen again. 3. 1 & 2 are lies. and 4. get over it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Mom, thank you for all that you've done and still do. I do love you and no one can replace my love… — OhItsVynn Copy Share Image
