One of the principal features of my entertainment is that it contains so many things that don't have anything to do with it. — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
Let's have the Union restored as it was, if we can; but if we can't, I'm in favor of the Union as it wasn't. — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
We wish genius and morality where affectionate companions, but it is a fact that they are often bitter enemies. They don't necessarily coalesce any… — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
The prevailin' weakness of most public men is to Slop Over!.... G. Washington never slopt over. — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
I prefer temperance hotels - although they sell worse kinds of liquor than any other kind of hotels. — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
It is true, that all married men have their own way, but the trouble is they don't all have their own way of having… — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
Trouble will come soon enough, and when he does come receive him as pleasantly as possible. The more amiably you greet him, the sooner… — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
Imagine for a moment Napoleon I, to have borne the name of Jenkins, or Washington to have sustained the appellation of John Smith! — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
I can't sing. As a singist I am not a success. I am saddest when I sing. So are those who hear me. They… — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
The Puritans nobly fled from a land of despotism to a land of freedim, where they could not only enjoy their own religion, but… — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
One of the principal features of my entertainment is that it contains so many things that don't have anything to do with it. — Artemas Ward Copy Share Image
