There's only one true superpower amongst human beings, and that is being funny. People treat you differently if you can make them laugh. — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
I never analyze stuff with comedy because it's boring. It makes you stop being funny. Just be who you are and do what you do, and you're either funny or you're not. — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
By the way, to perform in front of Don Rickles, it 's not nerve-wrecking. It 's enjoyable, i am enjoying Jeff Garlin. I hope… — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
Why do I want to be challenged or have challenges? That's why I don't go climb mountains. — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
Parents have got to chill out. Let your kid eat dirt - they're gonna be fine! — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
The worst kind of idiot is the one who doesn't think they're an idiot. — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
First off, I don't do self-deprecation comedy based on being fat. I would always talk about it honestly. Secondly, I don't care how much… — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
I like independent movies, documentaries. There's not a lot of movies that are commercially made that I dig. — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
Acting's fine if the script's written by Paddy Chayefsky and Martin Scorsese directs it, but unless you have something like that, I don't really… — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
When you see a bad romantic comedy, you see the script, the director, and the actors trying to create this warmth and this pathos… — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
I've avoided doing network shows because I don't think they're true to real families. — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
My kids have played soccer and baseball and basketball, and the parents who come to games are always saying and doing things that are… — Jeff Garlin Copy Share Image
