Bea Arthur Quotes by Lisa Lampanelli

It used to be that in media, Johnny Carson used to be the most important person when he would invite you over to sit…

— Lisa Lampanelli

I'm not looking for 'outer esteem' anymore, what they call 'other esteem.' I'm looking for self-esteem. And people think that self-esteem is built with…

— Lisa Lampanelli

This thing happened where I noticed anytime I got together with four friends or more, the conversation goes to food.

— Lisa Lampanelli

Insult comedy has been around forever. I can make fun of people, and they won't get mad at me.

— Lisa Lampanelli

I've played every comedy club and every theatre across the country for the last 25 years and seen a lot of audience members from…

— Lisa Lampanelli

I lost over 100 pounds, so I'm even angrier than ever. I don't stuff my feelings anymore with food. Skinny girls are funny.

— Lisa Lampanelli

I would make a few jabs at myself and go for the audience - they are still as flawed as ever.

— Lisa Lampanelli

Until I got the weight off, there was something inside of me that said, 'You hate yourself.' You get too depressed over the weight…

— Lisa Lampanelli

What you bring to the stage is what you are in real life... people sense that.

— Lisa Lampanelli

The more conservative you dress, the more you can get away with.

— Lisa Lampanelli

Crazy diets, good diets, you can't name one I didn't do.

— Lisa Lampanelli

I have a shrink in New York and a shrink in Arizona, just in case. You never know when you will have a breakdown.

— Lisa Lampanelli

Even going on stage is a service because it brings people up from thinking about their lost job or their lost spouse or something…

— Lisa Lampanelli

I heard Cher say, 'I answer to two people: Myself and God.' I say, 'I only answer to me. I'm not sure I appreciate…

— Lisa Lampanelli

I'm not a political comic at all, so it would be weird if I just turned into a preachy, sort-of political commentator.

— Lisa Lampanelli