You make me wanna staple bagels to my face, then remove them with a pitchfork. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I can't be skinny all the time. I like to drink and I like to eat. I like burgers and bagels. — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
“Daddy, how come in Kansas City the bagels taste like just round bread?” — Calvin Trillin Copy Share Image
I always thought that bagels and lox was my soul food, but it turns out it's sushi. — Sara Sheridan Copy Share Image
“Just for taste bites of sample bagels have - fun fact - between zero and "screw you" calories” — Rachel Vail Copy Share Image
Bagel in the morning is the ultimate breakfast for me; they're just good. — Lee DeWyze Copy Share Image
My sister married a German. He complained he couldn't get a good bagel back home. I said: 'Well, whose fault is that?' — Emo Philips Copy Share Image
Guys wake up at your place and they expect breakfast. They don't eat bagels and M&M's in the morning. They want things… — Elayne Boosler Copy Share Image
I definitely invented the everything bagel. There's no doubt. It's undeniable truth. It's one of those things that's 100% true, 50% of the time. — Joe Bastianich Copy Share Image
They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn't always stay hot. I know, because I eat… — Shaquille O'Neal Copy Share Image
When I'm in L.A., I have salads, sandwiches, and soups all the time. Eating in New York, I feel like I have… — Peyton List Copy Share Image
From a Twitter post on why food is better than people: 'Bagels don't talk about you behind your back.' ... Since WHEN??? — John Alejandro King Aka The Covert Comic Copy Share Image
Montreal bagels are much better than U.S. bagels, because there's a sweetness to the dough, and there's a pull. New York bagels… — Antoni Porowski Copy Share Image
Romanians have a saying, 'Not every dog has a bagel on its tail.' It means that not all streets are paved with… — Nadia Comaneci Copy Share Image
Bryn ate her bagel in silence, and by the time she was finished, Liam had already neatly packed her overnight bag and… — Rachel Caine Copy Share Image
I served seven years as the chair of the Princeton economics department where I had responsibility for major policy decisions, such as… — Ben Bernanke Copy Share Image
Olympia was a town crawling with music. I was new to the whole punk scene. The culture shock continued; Olympia had bagels!… — Beth Ditto Copy Share Image
Once I was coming down a street in Beverly Hills and I saw a Cadillac about a block long, and out of… — Dorothy Parker Copy Share Image
The bagel is a lonely roll to eat all by yourself because in order for the true taste to come out you… — Gertrude Berg Copy Share Image
The first printed mention of bagels... is to be found in the Community Regulations of Kracow, Poland, for the year 1610 which… — Leo Rosten Copy Share Image
“Deming and his mother loved everything bagels, the sheer balls of it, the New York audacity that a bagel could proclaim to… — Lisa Ko Copy Share Image
The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful insurance… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“In the center of the table is a classic deli platter of lox and tuna salad with all the fixings, bagels, and… — Stacey Ballis Copy Share Image
I used to wonder why God used a prop like the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil to inflict guilt on… — Jon Rappoport Copy Share Image
Mom used to walk with me for something like two or three miles to get to the day-old bakery. They had those… — Sandra Cisneros Copy Share Image
“he’d known exactly what he would find when he opened the refrigerator doors: one solitary unopened Egg Beater carton that had expired… — Julie James Copy Share Image
That was close,"he said, helping himself to coffee. Yeah, you almost opened the door to Morelli." I wasn't talking about Morelli. I… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“Why do seagulls live by the sea? A: Because if they live by the bay, they’d be bagels.” — Joe Kozlowski Copy Share Image
On weekends, I do brunch at home: whole grain bagels, lox, avocado, eggs, and organic bacon. — Mary Helen Bowers Copy Share Image
I tried being anorexic for four hours and then i was like, i need some bagels — Kat Dennings Copy Share Image
I do like bagels. I like cream cheese and cranberries. It is really good. — Sasha Pieterse Copy Share Image
Just out of curiosity, can an immortal choke to death on a bagel? (Francesca) — Sherrilyn Kenyon Copy Share Image
I've said this before, and I say it again. Bagels can be an enormous power for good or for evil. It is… — Daniel Pinkwater Copy Share Image
