Adrian Mole's diary Easter Poor Jesus, it must have been…

“Mrs. Joe was a very clean housekeeper, but had an exquisite art of making her cleanliness more uncomfortable and unacceptable than dirt itself.”

— Charles Dickens

“Someone broke from the scrum and, punching and kicking, staggered towards the Klatchian goal. "Isn't that man your butler?" said Ahmed. "Yes." "One of…

— Terry Pratchett

“People think common sense is common - but it's not.”

— Don Cherry

“The ECTs are moving the guns in small batches," Bat said. "We're making them take so many photos that one of them asked if…

— Warren Ellis

“Damn it!” I rubbed my eyes. My head hurt from staring at the laptop screen the whole day. “I’ve got to put this down…

— Chase Webster

“Sacharissa saw a movement. Boddony had pulled his axe out from under the bench. It was a traditional dwarf axe. One side was a…

— Terry Pratchett

“Her books on alchemy were marvellous objects, every page a work of the engraver's art, but they nowhere contained instructions like "Be sure to…

— Terry Pratchett

“I'm not bloody well going to have it, understand?" Vimes shouted, shaking the ape back and forth. "Oook," the Librarian pointed out, patiently. "What?…

— Terry Pratchett

“After a few minutes, Molly came partway up the short ladder to the bridge and stopped. "Do I need to ask permission to come…

— Jim Butcher

“I've had quite enough danger for a while I think. I might have some more when I'm thirteen, but definitely not before then...”

— Joshua Donellan

“The weed-whacker dad was helping his kid whack weeds. Dad was blitzed to the eyebrows on beer, and the kid was waving the week…

— Carsten Stroud

“Vimes shook some lather off the blade. "Hah! I bet they have. Tell me, Willikins, did you fight much when you were a kid?…

— Terry Pratchett

“It would be like The Rock versus Seth Green. Now, tell me who he is”

— Tammy Blackwell

“A fool, a fool! I met a fool i' the forest, A motley fool; a miserable world! As I do live by food, I…

— William Shakespeare

“The street was full of animals, milling around uncertainly. When animals are in a state of uncertainty they get nervous, and the street was…

— Terry Pratchett