And it’s a shame that the measure is what is not so bad…
![“And it’s a shame that the measure is what is not so bad [in relationships and partners] instead of what is thriving and good […] I have had good relationships, but it’s hard to trust that because what I consider good doesn’t always feel very good at all.” quote by Roxane Gay](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/d5e/roxane-gay-520_bad-relationships_and-it-s-a-shame-that-the-measure-is-wha_1887967.png)
““And it’s a shame that the measure is what is not so bad [in relationships and partners] instead of what is thriving and good […] I have had good relationships, but it’s hard to trust that because what I consider good doesn’t always feel very good at all.””
About This Quote
This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.
She critiques how relationships are judged by flaws rather than strengths, noting difficulty trusting good relationships.
In simple terms: People focus on negatives instead of positives in love.
Key Takeaway
Shift focus to what thrives in relationships.
Themes
relationships
trust
evaluation
expectations
self‑esteem
Mood
thoughtful
analytical
empathetic
Type
essay
reflective
When to use this quote
- dating
- long‑term partnership
- friendships
- self‑reflection
Key Concepts
psychology
relationship dynamics
optimism
Questions to Reflect On
- How can you recognize thriving aspects in a partnership?
- What steps help rebuild trust after disappointment?
A Different Perspective
Overlooks that some relationships truly are problematic.