Take your patience pill ...You can be joyous, but you…

And I will not be beaten by that jackass." "Jackass?" said Foaly, wounded. "My favorite uncle is a jackass.

— Eoin Colfer

All work and no play may make Jim a dull boy, but no work and all play makes Jim all kinds of a jackass.

— William Randolph Hearst

One of my pet peeves is that when people are in their automobiles, I think they're exceptionally rude on the road. I would love…

— Chris Carmack

The dividing line [between friends and acquaintances] is communication, I think. A friend is someone to whom you can say any jackass thing that…

— John D. MacDonald

Knowledge is like the carrot, few know by looking at the green top that the best part, the orange part, is there. Like the…

— Nasreddin

Jessica: “You great drunken jackass!” Dain: “I did not give you leave to use my Christian name.

— Loretta Chase

More than one side? You're Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Jackass!

— Chuck Palahniuk

So release yourself from that. Don't be strategic or coy. Strategic and coy are for jackasses. Be brave. Be authentic. Practice saying the word…

— Cheryl Strayed

I have been called a curmudgeon, which my obsolescent dictionary defines as a 'surly, ill-mannered, bad-tempered fellow'. Nowadays, curmudgeon is likely to refer to…

— Edward Abbey

It didn’t make any more sense to me then than it does now, how life can pile troubles up on a man what don’t…

— Caleb Carr

When wine drinkers tell me they taste notes of cherries, tobacco and rose petals, usually all I can detect is a whole lot of…

— Joel Stein

Ma'am, when I got up this morning, I didn't want to be jackass. You just pushed my jackass button.

— Bill Engvall

The jackasses at Elections Canada are out of control.

— Stephen Harper

Friends don't let Jackasses drink and drive.

— Roger Ebert

Any jackass can talk about bombing Iran.

— Chris Matthews