“It took a lot to render me silent, like learning my grandma had been a stripper in her youth,” — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“Do you mind if we leave here so I can chain smoke 'til I throw up so it will be easier to… — Robyn Peterman Contemporary-comedy Copy Share Image
“Ready does not factor into the equation, Angel. Life happens whether we are ready or not—the only choice or control we have… — Robyn Peterman Life Copy Share Image
“Life happens whether we are ready or not—the only choice or control we have is whether or not we will rise to… — Robyn Peterman Choice Copy Share Image
“It takes a while for the heat to work in this piece of shit, but when it kicks in, you’ll sweat like… — Robyn Peterman Contemporary-comedy Copy Share Image
“And you're on crack. I'm a witch and you're a wolf. I was not built to blow puppies out of my hooha."… — Robyn Peterman Lion Copy Share Image
“I didn't know about you. Your mother never told me. When I found out I confronted her and she turned me into… — Robyn Peterman Father Copy Share Image
“I grabbed a beer out of the fridge and slammed it shut. I shouldn’t have come. I should have waited outside for… — Robyn Peterman Contemporary-comedy Copy Share Image
“Are your panties up your ass?” Dwayne asked, concerned. “No. Why?” “Well, it looked like you were adjusting your hoohoo and I… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“Granny was quiet. She was either contemplating Dwayne’s story or trying to come up with one that would top his. I shivered… — Robyn Peterman Anecdotes Copy Share Image
“I was amazing,” Dwayne squealed triumphantly as he landed gracefully in the middle of the room. “I did the meld and they… — Robyn Peterman Absolutely fabulous Copy Share Image
“Puck Flare’s eyes turned blood red and narrowed to slits. “What have you done to me?” he demanded as a spear of… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“Where’s Granny?” “She stayed in town. Go, go, go.” Junior quickly shifted and left. “Dwayne?” I inquired. “He’s also in town doing… — Robyn Peterman Drag queen Copy Share Image
“Out," I instructed as I began peeling my clothes from my body. "I am going to pee for twenty-seven minutes, and then… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“Tomorrow would be a new day filled with uncertainty and very possibly danger, but right now all was right with my world.… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“I quickly texted Granny and told her to call around and find out the buzz on the recruiting. She texted back that… — Robyn Peterman Granny Copy Share Image
“Can I ask you something weird?” Dwayne inquired. “Does it pertain?” “Yes.” “Fine, but hurry. I’m due in the agency in ten.”… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“Do you do it on purpose?” “Do what?” he asked, confused. “Leave me with images that no amount of psychotherapy could remove?… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“Dwayne, can you shoot a gun?” Dwayne rolled his eyes. “Hanky-poo, Dwayne doesn’t need a gun. I have crap in my repertoire… — Robyn Peterman Life Copy Share Image
“You ready, Dead Boy?” Granny asked. Oh, hell to the no…She was dressed in a boob tube, peasant skirt and sequined kitten… — Robyn Peterman Granny Copy Share Image
“Okay, um…you guys have fun, and Dwayne, if you’re going to eat you need to be discreet. We’re used to a variety… — Robyn Peterman Granny Copy Share Image
“You should take Dwayne out and show him the town—maybe go to the beach or stroll down Main Street.” “She’s got that… — Robyn Peterman Main street Copy Share Image
“I opened my mouth and projectile-vomited on her from head to toe. The more I retched, the more I had to retch.… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“How’d that turn out?” I tried not to laugh, but failed. Who in the hell tried to microwave a damn phone? “Not… — Robyn Peterman Forgiveness Copy Share Image
“I love you, Essie. Before you came into my life, I had considered ending myself. Three hundred years is a long time… — Robyn Peterman Drag queen Copy Share Image
“He shifted his attention back to me and leaned in closer. “I told you to behave. I don’t want to have to… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“How about Al?” Sam suggested. “Perfect,” Dave grinned. “Um . . . Hi Poseidon, this is Al.” “Al who?” “Al Jacques Yuoff!”… — Robyn Peterman Copy Share Image
“I'm twenty-nine, happily single and getting it on a regular basis' I said, enjoying the way their thin lips hung open in… — Robyn Peterman Contemporary-comedy Copy Share Image
“Sometimes talking about painful things helps, Essie,” Dwayne said gently. “I’ll go first. About two hundred and fifty years ago during a… — Robyn Peterman Famine Copy Share Image
