Jonathan Swift

My hunger serves me instead of a clock.

— Jonathan Swift

Kitchen Physic is the best Physic.

— Jonathan Swift

A carpenter is known by his chips.

— Jonathan Swift

Many a truth is told in jest.

— Jonathan Swift

Bread is the staff of life.

— Jonathan Swift

Philosophy! the lumber of the schools.

— Jonathan Swift

Praise is the daughter of present power.

— Jonathan Swift

Observation is an old man's memory.

— Jonathan Swift

Life is a tragedy wherein we sit as spectators for a while and then act our part in it.

— Jonathan Swift

The two noblest of things, which are sweetness and light.

— Jonathan Swift

Conversation is but carving! Give no more to every guest Than he's able to digest.

— Jonathan Swift

When dunces are satiric, I take it for a panegyric.

— Jonathan Swift

“whereof one was a page that held up his train, and”

— Jonathan Swift

I would rather be a freeman among slaves than a slave among freemen.

— Jonathan Swift

I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing.

— Jonathan Swift

Vision is the art of seeing what is invisible to others.

— Jonathan Swift

The tucked-up sempstress walks with hasty strides, While streams run down her oil'd umbrella's sides.

— Jonathan Swift

As love without esteem is capricious and volatile; esteem without love is languid and cold.

— Jonathan Swift

There seems to be no part of knowledge in fewer hands than that of discerning when to have done.

— Jonathan Swift

“But though a Church of England man thinks every species of government equally lawful, he does not think them equally expedient; or…

— Jonathan Swift

Those dreams that on the silent night intrude, and with false flitting shapes our minds delude ... are mere productions of the…

— Jonathan Swift

Words are but wind; and learning is nothing but words; ergo, learning is nothing but wind.

— Jonathan Swift

“Of so little weight are the greatest services to princes, when put into the balance with a refusal to gratify their passions.”

— Jonathan Swift

How is it possible to expect that mankind will take advice when they will not so much as take warning.

— Jonathan Swift

There are but three ways for a man to revenge himself of the censure of the world,--to despise it, to return the…

— Jonathan Swift

“...que vinieron a confirmarme más en mi vieja convicción de que no existe nada demasiado irracional y disparatado que no haya sido…

— Jonathan Swift

Pride, ill nature, and want of sense are the three great sources of ill manners; without some one of these defects, no…

— Jonathan Swift

Dignity, high station, or great riches, are in some sort necessary to old men, in order to keep the younger at a…

— Jonathan Swift

“For these reasons, the trade of a soldier is held the most honorable of all others, because a soldier is a Yahoo…

— Jonathan Swift

I can discover no political evil in suffering bullies, sharpers, and rakes, to rid the world of each other by a method…

— Jonathan Swift

Lose no time to contradict her, Nor endeavor to convict her; Only take this rule along, Always to advise her wrong, And…

— Jonathan Swift

For, if we take an examination of what is generally understood by happiness, as it has respect either to the understanding or…

— Jonathan Swift

This single Stick, which you now behold ingloriously lying in that neglected Corner, I once knew in a flourishing State in a…

— Jonathan Swift

“The author of these Travels, Mr. Lemuel Gulliver, is my ancient and intimate friend; there is likewise some relation between us on…

— Jonathan Swift

Judges... are picked out from the most dextrous lawyers, who are grown old or lazy, and having been biased all their lives…

— Jonathan Swift

I have ever hated all nations, professions, and communities, and all my love is toward individuals: for instance, I hate the tribe…

— Jonathan Swift

“I enjoyed perfect health of body, and tranquillity of mind; I did not feel the treachery or inconstancy of a friend, nor…

— Jonathan Swift

“They look upon fraud as a greater crime than theft, and therefore seldom fail to punish it with death; for they allege,…

— Jonathan Swift

“Jonathan Swift (November 30, 1667 – October 19, 1745) was an Irish cleric, satirist, essayist, political pamphleteer (first for Whigs then for…

— Jonathan Swift

“There are certain common privileges of a writer, the benefit whereof I hope there will be no reason to doubt; particularly, that…

— Jonathan Swift