The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool. — Jane Wagner Ability Copy Share Image
When you're dancing the mystical dance of the molecules, you're not the one who's leading. — Jane Wagner Dance Copy Share Image
... it's hard to be politically conscious and upwardly mobile at the same time. — Jane Wagner Copy Share Image
I am sick of being the victim of trends I reflect but don't even understand. — Jane Wagner Copy Share Image
I worry that humanity has been "advanced" to its present level of incompetency because evolution works on the Peter Principle. — Jane Wagner Evolution Copy Share Image
To think, we have the garment industry instead of nature to thank for the zipper concept when it would have come in… — Jane Wagner Childbirth Copy Share Image
If evolution was worth its salt, by now it should've evolved something better than survival of the fittest. I think a better… — Jane Wagner Evolution Copy Share Image
Frankly, goin' crazy was the best thing that ever happened to me. I don't say it's for everybody; some people couldn't cope. — Jane Wagner Best thing that ever happened to me Copy Share Image
“I worry whoever thought up the term 'quality control' thought if we didn't control it, it would get out of hand.” — Jane Wagner Quality control Copy Share Image
“See, the human mind is kind of like...a pinata. When it breaks open, there's a lot of surprises inside. Once you get… — Jane Wagner Copy Share Image
Ahhhhhhhh. There is nothing natural about natural childbirth. It is as close to a freak accident as anything I can think of.… — Jane Wagner Accidents Copy Share Image
My space chums think reality was once a primitive method of crowd control that got out of hand. In my view, it’s… — Jane Wagner Absurdity Copy Share Image
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or worse. God… — Jane Wagner Action Copy Share Image
Childhood comes at a time in your life when you are too young to understand what you are going through. And you're… — Jane Wagner Childhood Copy Share Image
My mom says I have to be more positive, and I say life has to be more positive too or it's just… — Jane Wagner Copy Share Image
I may not be great at geometry but I know one theorum. The longest distance between two points is you and your… — Jane Wagner Copy Share Image
I even worry about reflective flea collars. Oh, sure, drivers can see them glow in the dark, but so can the fleas. — Jane Wagner Copy Share Image
When you are enjoying life time flies by, when you are not it stands still, though in reflection of this stillness, the… — Jane Wagner Enjoying life Copy Share Image
