Wife: one who is sorry she did it, but would undoubtedly do it again. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
When you sympathize with a married woman you either make two enemies or gain one wife and one friend. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
A wealthy man is one who earns $100 a year more than his wife's sister's husband. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
Great artists are modest almost as seldom as they are faithful to their wives. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
Christian - One who is willing to serve three Gods, but draws the line at one wife. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
Popularity--The capacity for listening sympathetically when men boast of their wives and women complain of their husbands. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
Only a jackass ever talks over his affairs with a woman, whether she be his sweetheart, wife, or sister, or mother. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
Wealth - any income that is at least one hundred dollars more a year than the income of one's wife's sister's husband. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
“Whenever a husband and a wife begin to discuss their marriage they are giving evidence at a coroner's inquest.” — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
Love, to the inferior man, remains almost wholly a physical matter. The heroine he most admires is the one who offers the… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
Don't tell me what delusion he entertains regarding God, or what mountebank he follows in politics, or what he springs from, or… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
The double standard of morality will survive in this world so long as the woman whose husband has been lured away is… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
No man could bring himself to reveal his true character, and, above all, his true limitations as a citizen and a Christian,… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
A bad artist almost always tries to conceal his incompetence by whooping up a new formula. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
By profession a biologist, [Thomas Henry Huxley] covered in fact the whole field of the exact sciences, and then bulged through its four fences.… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
So few men are really worth knowing, that it seems a shameful waste to let an anthropoid prejudice stand in the way of free… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
Man's objection to love is that it dies hard; woman's, that when it is dead, it stays dead. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
For it is an absurdity to call a country civilized in which a decent and industrious man, laboriously mastering a trade which is valuble… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
Women have simple tastes. They get pleasure out of the conversation of children in arms and men in love. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
The critic, to interpret his artist, even to understand his artist, must be able to get into the mind of his artist; he must… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
There is, in fact, nothing about religious opinions that entitles them to any more respect than other opinions get. On the contrary, they tend… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
Liberty ... was a two-headed boon. There was first, the liberty of the people as a whole to determine the forms of their own… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
To the extent that I am genuinely educated, I am suspicious of all the things that the average citizen believes and the average pedagogue… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
Philosophy first constructs a scheme of happiness and then tries to fit the world to it. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
For it is the natural tendency of the ignorant to believe what is not true. In order to overcome that tendency it is not… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share
