Funniest sports Quotes · Page 2

The Mets just had their first .500-or-better April since July of 1992.

— Ralph Kiner

I made a 1,600 minus 800 minus 200 on the SAT, so I'm very intelligent when I speak.

— Shaquille O'Neal

We must have had 99 per cent of the match. It was the other three per cent that cost us.

— Ruud Gullit

I don't want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win.

— Sherman Douglas

I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that.

— Jerry Rice

The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23!

— Kevin Keegan

Yeah, I'm cocky and I am arrogant. But that doesn't mean I'm not a nice person.

— Jeremy Roenick

You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that.

— Murray Mexted

Well, Rickey's not one of them, so that's 49 percent right there.

— Rickey Henderson

Most football players are temperamental. That's 90 percent temper and 10 percent mental.

— Doug Plank

The drivers have one foot on the brake, one on the clutch and one on the throttle.

— Bob Varsha

Left hand, right hand, it doesn't matter. I'm amphibious.

— Charles Shackleford

Booze, broads and bullshit. If you got all that, what else do you need?

— Harry Caray

You can sum up this sport in two words: You never know.

— Lou Duva