Sometimes I prayed for Baby Jesus to make me good, but Baby Jesus didn't. — Barbara Kingsolver Copy Share Image
“Which brings me to the point of this call." Thank God, baby Jesus, and the Holy Ghost.” — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
“Aaargh...that'll teach me to eat pig in the promised land. Sorry Baby Jesus.” — Guy Delisle Copy Share Image
“Was he confused? Drunk? Took too many balls to the face? And dear sweet Mary mother of baby Jesus, that was a… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
I wish this year, baby Jesus blesses you and your loved ones abundantly. Have a blessed Christmas. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When Christmas Eve comes, go to a window and looking at sky ask baby Jesus for more people to be fortunate enough… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
May the love of baby Jesus surround your home with peace and joy. I'm sending you all of my earnest and loving… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The best gift you could give baby Jesus on his birthday is a clean heart. Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Actually, Saint Peter was in jail, one time --" I laugh. "Babies don't go in jail." "This happened when they were all… — Emma Donoghue Copy Share Image
As long as you're remembering baby Jesus, does it matter when you're remembering him. That's what I'm saying about Christmas, I might… — Karl Pilkington Copy Share Image
“Whoa, the baby Jesus lives in Chamberlain?” “In an igloo next to the inn. Try again.” “Um,” — Chris d'Lacey Copy Share Image
The birth of the baby Jesus stands as the most significant event in all history, because it has meant the pouring into… — George Matthew Adams Copy Share Image
I went to school for a short period of time to study fashion. I wanted to become a stylist or a designer.… — Bethany Cosentino Copy Share Image
Back in Georgie's attic, he yanks the phone out of the socket and begins scrolling down the names under dialed calls, praying… — Melina Marchetta Copy Share Image
I've always wanted to do blow with Genghis Khan, 'bet that guy knows how to party. I also think a bottle of… — Mike Mendez Copy Share Image
I auditioned for the role of an angel in the Nativity play at school. I didn't get it. I auditioned for Mary;… — Nicole Kidman Copy Share Image
No touching Baby Jesus.” “But we’re his parents!” proclaimed Mary Beth, who was being generous to include poor Joseph under this appellation.… — John Irving Copy Share Image
Of course, certain religious expressions are fine. If a tribe of Aqualishes wants to boil rhino horns in frog saliva on the… — Kathleen Parker Copy Share Image
“I want to remember...Smelling your newness upon this earth. The baby-Jesus smell as Grandma used to put it. Pure. Unsullied. Like the… — Carew Papritz Copy Share Image
I love my family but my family - they're the type of people that never let you forget anything you ever did...… — Wanda Sykes Copy Share Image
Sweet baby Jesus, Blue Eyes was… He was gorgeous in all the ways that made girls do stupid things. He was tall,… — J. Lynn Copy Share Image
“We were watching this procession. It was fucking terrible and the crucifix was about 20 feet high coming around the corner. And… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
Question the Chestnuts. Chestnuts: the new name for boobs? No. NO. Why would you even say that? Get your mind out of… — Chuck Wendig Copy Share Image
“What started Baby Jesus growing in Mary's tummy was an angel zoomed down, like a ghost but a really cool one with… — Emma Donoghue Copy Share Image
“In one corner of the square is a manger scene with two live sheep, a bed of hay, a couple of cows.… — Laura Kelly Copy Share Image
Let us remember that the Christmas heart is a giving heart, a wide open heart that thinks of others first. The birth… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“But there was air conditioning. Sweet, precious, thank-you-baby-Jesus air conditioning.” — Amanda Heger Copy Share Image
People say that the modern Christmas focuses too much on food instead of, like in olden times, the little Baby Jesus. Piffle. — Grace Dent Copy Share Image
May this Christmas you be blessed and healed by the purity and innocence of Baby Jesus. May all your sins be forgiven.… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you take off your pants and her first reaction is, "Awwww, look at it...like a little baby Jesus." Time to buy… — Dave Attell Copy Share Image
“Baby Jesus, meek and mild, pray for me, an orphan child. Be my strength, be my friend, be with me until the… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
