Fall in love Quote by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
““The only reason you say that race was not an issue is because you wish it was not. We all wish it was not. But it’s a lie. I came from a country where race was not an issue; I did not think of myself as black and I only became black when I came to America. When you are black in America and you fall in love with a white person, race doesn’t matter when you’re alone together because it’s just you and your love. But the minute you step outside, race matters. But we don’t talk about it. We don’t even tell our white partners the small things that piss us off and the things we wish they understood better, because we’re worried they will say we’re overreacting, or we’re being too sensitive. And we don’t want them to say, Look how far we’ve come, just forty years ago it would have been illegal for us to even be a couple blah blah blah, because you know what we’re thinking when they say that? We’re thinking why the fuck should it ever have been illegal anyway? But we don’t say any of this stuff. We let it pile up inside our heads and when we come to nice liberal dinners like this, we say that race doesn’t matter because that’s what we’re supposed to say, to keep our nice liberal friends comfortable. It’s true. I speak from experience.””
About This Quote
Source Essay or speech on race relations
Race is often ignored in private intimacy but resurfaces publicly, causing unspoken tension and frustration.
In simple terms: Race matters despite personal love.
Acknowledge and discuss race openly.
Themes
Mood
Type
When to use this quote
- interracial relationships
- family gatherings
- political discussions
Key Concepts
Questions to Reflect On
- How can partners address racial concerns?
- What steps foster honest dialogue?
Avoiding race talk can perpetuate misunderstanding.