““Of course I could have done things differently. I could stop fucking thinking about you and obsessing over you and fucking wanting you for just long enough to do my fucking job—that’s what I could do differently." [...] "Have you any idea what every day here is like for me? I can’t eat, I can’t focus, I can’t sleep. I spend my nights frozen in one position, afraid to move in case I accidentally do all the things I really, really want to do. I want to do them so much that just having you look at me is a kind of torture. Just being near you, just getting a hint of that maddening marzipan scent that’s all over your hair—””
