Sarcastic Life Quotes
- He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. — Victor Borge
- I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. — A. Whitney Brown
- Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. — Johnny Carson
- Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some. — Alfred Hitchcock
- A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility. — Lawrence G. Lovasik
- I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. — Groucho Marx
- The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. — George Bernard Shaw
- The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. — Lily Tomlin
- It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue. — Voltaire
- Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence. — Ashleigh Brilliant
- Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies. — Oliver Goldsmith
- 'Are you mad at me?' Nooooo, I'm actually happy that you broke my heart and hurt me.... — Blondie:)
- Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else. — Uknown
- I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here. — Stephen Bishop
- I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like? — Jean Cocteau
- When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". F*ck off. What good is a goddamn cake you can't… — George Carlin
- Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked "Brightness," but it doesn't work. — Gallagher
- Dear Karma, I really hate you right now, you made your point. — Ottilie Weber