Practical Joke Quotes
28 quotes by 27 authors
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Elvis was, at least the times I was around him, Elvis was a practical joker. He was always, had some little mischievous something going.
— Jackie DeShannon
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I always thought my genitals were the result of some crude practical joke.
— Steven Morrissey
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If you make people laugh or cry about little black marks on sheets of white paper, what is that but a practical joke? All the…
— Kurt Vonnegut
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I'm a traveling practical joker. That's my line of work.
— Colin Mochrie
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I'm terrible at practical jokes. I do them too well, so they're not funny. I end up saying, “Oh, no, I'm joking, I'm joking .
— Anna Torv
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The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on us. Apparently, women need to feel loved to have sex.…
— Billy Connolly
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Nobody was perfect. Not even close. And everybody had wrinkles from smiling and squinting and craining their necks. Everybody has marks on their bodies from…
— Katherine Center
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A Swedish newspaper reporter called and said, You've been awarded the Prize. I was quite sure it was a practical joke.
— Joshua Lederberg
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The only really good vegetable is Tabasco sauce. Put Tabasco sauce in everything. Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin. The…
— P.J. O'Rourke
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Most practical jokes, I'll feel too bad for the other person so I'll stop just before the punchline.
— Larry David
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My father, the practical joker, did not care for practical jokes on himself; he did not encourage the practice in me.
— Lincoln Steffens
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I never really was much of a practical jokester or anything.
— Kristanna Loken
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The humorist who invented trial by jury played a colossal practical joke upon the world, but since we have the system we ought to try…
— Mark Twain
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I'm just not the outgoing bubble of energy. But if I know you, it's different. Practical jokes. Have fun. I'm not looking for any new…
— Eric Dickerson
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I was in California the first time I heard Michael Jackson wanted to record with me. I was, like, 'Nah, no way, he's too big,…
— Heavy D
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There are certain queer times and occasions in this strange mixed affair we call life when a man takes his whole universe for a vast…
— Herman Melville
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When I was coaching with the Patriots, the players pulled a practical joke and I said, 'Do you think I'm Charlie the Tuna, like a…
— Bill Parcells
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Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?
— Rita Rudner
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Zac Efron is like a brother who's just goofy and crazy. He plays a lot of practical jokes.
— Ashley Tisdale
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Life seemed to be an educator's practical joke in which you spent the first half learning and the second half learning that everything you learned…
— Russell Baker
Who Wrote These Practical Joke Quotes
27 authors contributed a total of 28 Practical Joke Quotes, led by these top contributors: