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- My girlfriend hates it when I sneak up on her. According to her lawyer, she also hates it when I call her… — Hussein Nishah
- YOU KNOW ITS GOING TO BE A GOOD STORY WHEN IT STARTS OFF WITH 'SO THIS BITCH' — Asheya
- Love is bullshit. Emotion is bullshit. I am a rock. A jerk. I'm an uncaring asshole and proud of it. — Chuck Palahniuk
- When people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you, and it doesn't… — T.D. Jakes
- Lies circle the earth while Truth is still trying to put on its shoes. — Napoleon Bonaparte
- I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. — Thomas A. Edison
- Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much. — Oscar Wilde
- If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? — Steven Wright