In statesmanship get formalities right, never mind about the moralities. — Mark Twain Character Copy Share Image
“The humorous story is American, the comic story is English, the witty story is French.” — Mark Twain Comedy Copy Share Image
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. — Mark Twain Books Copy Share Image
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. — Mark Twain Business Copy Share Image
A good and wholesome thing is a little harmless fun in this world; it tones a body up and keeps him human… — Mark Twain Body Copy Share Image
We can't always have the beautiful aspect of things. Let us make the most of our sights that are beautiful and let… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Life should begin with age and it's privileges and accumulations, and end with youth and it's capacity to splendidly enjoy such advantages. — Mark Twain Accumulation Copy Share Image
We may not doubt that society in heaven consists mainly of undesirable persons. — Mark Twain Doubt Copy Share Image
Data is like garbage. You'd better know what you are going to do with it before you collect it. — Mark Twain Communication Copy Share Image
Concentration of power in a political machine is bad; and an Established Church is only a political machine; it was invented for… — Mark Twain Computers Copy Share Image
“But it seems to be a law of human constitution that those that deserve shall not have and those that do not… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The observance of Thanksgiving Day-as a function-has become general of late years. The Thankfulness is not so general. This is natural. Two-thirds… — Mark Twain Being thankful Copy Share Image
It was on the 10th day of May - 1884 - that I confessed to age by mounting spectacles for the first… — Mark Twain Age Copy Share Image
The old man laughed loud and joyously, shook up the details of his anatomy from head to foot, and ended by saying… — Mark Twain Anatomy Copy Share Image
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon… — Mark Twain Age Copy Share Image
What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth. No smallest atom of our moral, mental, or physical structure can stand… — Mark Twain Atoms Copy Share Image
If we should deal out justice only, in this world, who would escape? No, it is better to be generous, and in… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“And what does it amount to?" said Satan, with his evil chuckle. "Nothing at all. You gain nothing; you always come out… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“A God who could make good children as easily a bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made every… — Mark Twain Agnostic Copy Share Image
A private should preserve a respectful attitude toward his superiors, and should seldom or never proceed so far as to offer suggestions… — Mark Twain Advice Copy Share Image
“I reckon the widow or the parson or somebody prayed that this bread would find me, and here it have gone and… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The law of God, as quite plainly expressed in woman's construction is this: There shall be no limit put upon your intercourse… — Mark Twain Absence Copy Share Image
“The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad. I speak now, of… — Mark Twain Arrogance Copy Share Image
“THERE were two “Reigns of Terror,” if we would but remember it and consider it; the one wrought murder in hot passion,… — Mark Twain Death Copy Share Image
I have been scientifically studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so-called,) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions… — Mark Twain Allegiance Copy Share Image
“The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.” — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular is providence — Mark Twain Providence Copy Share Image
...one should be gentle with the ignorant, for they are the chosen of God. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
