Judy Gold Quotes
- My doctor said I had OCD. I couldn't believe it. I had to call him nine times to make sure.
- If you're going to hit a car, try to be sure that it's not a cop car
- We never talked to each other in my family. We communicated by putting Ann Landers articles on the refrigerator.
- What if obese people couldn't get married?
- Twelve years ago my mother gets her cataracts removed. So twelve years ago the doctor gives her these enormous sunglasses to wear to protect her…
- Over the years, things got so bad between my mother and I, we stopped talking to each other and started communicating by putting Ann Landers…
- Many comics stay in one city and develop their acts for that particular audience.
- People always think you have a lot of money when they see you on TV.
- Women are taught that if you want to be a lady, keep your opinions to yourself and be polite.
- There is no reason to be ashamed of who you are.
- When you see another tall woman on the street, you nod, sort of like Orthodox Jews.
- Comedy is the most palliative way to make a point. People are more willing to listen if they can laugh.
- As scary as it was being raised by one Jewish mother, I have to feel for my kids because they have two Jewish mothers.
- I live on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. I live in a 950-square-foot apartment with one bathroom and two sons.
- The first time I did stand-up was on a dare.
- Joan Rivers was my hero.
- Halloween is an opportunity to be really creative.
- Female comics cannot dress provocatively on stage.
- My Shabbat dinner is not to be reckoned with.
- My two sons are the biggest pigs - always dirty, sweaty, burping and farting.