Greg Behrendt

Sometimes we become attached to what's familiar, and sometimes we hold on to things that are safe and predictable, even if they…

— Greg Behrendt

...you are defined by how you live your life, not whom you live it with, and certainly not by what you gave…

— Greg Behrendt

The quickest way to rectify that mistake (choosing the wrong person) is by learning from that, moving on, and choosing much more…

— Greg Behrendt

Lying, cheating, hiding is the exact opposite of the behavior of a man who's really into you.

— Greg Behrendt

If he's choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight,…

— Greg Behrendt

So, I play in a band. It's a really underground band. Super underground. Very underground. Like, we don't even actually play.

— Greg Behrendt

A man who wants to make a relationship work will move mountains to keep the woman he loves

— Greg Behrendt

We were raised to pursue women... Most of the guys I know enjoy the pursuit. But that doesn't mean women should be…

— Greg Behrendt

I don't know if you know you're funny, but you enjoy being funny. I know I'm funny because people tell me I…

— Greg Behrendt

I'm just saying, tonight, if you're going through a breakup and you're drinking, don't call. Just don't do it. Don't call. Because…

— Greg Behrendt

“wasting time with the wrong person is just time wasted. And when you do move on and find your right person, believe…

— Greg Behrendt

I love to eat. That's why I got so fat; I love to eat. If I don't walk away from a meal…

— Greg Behrendt

One of the suckiest and most frustrating facts of life is that sometimes relationship just end, often without reason. I truly believe…

— Greg Behrendt

Feeling in love (or lust) and fear feel a lot alike. They both give you that anxious butterfly feeling in your stomach,…

— Greg Behrendt

Here's something else to think about: calling when you say you're going to is the very first brick in the house you…

— Greg Behrendt

There will never be a good time, financially, to get married, unless you're Shaq or Ray Romano. But somehow people manage. If…

— Greg Behrendt

Don't you want the guy who'll forget about all the other things in his life before he forgets about you?

— Greg Behrendt

It is in that moment, when you really lay down your cards and see the relationship for what it was, that you'll…

— Greg Behrendt

She didn't love me that much, but she moved in with me. That's a plus. And then one night, I caught her…

— Greg Behrendt

There's a guy out there who will want to tell everyone that he is your boyfriend. Quit goofing around and go find…

— Greg Behrendt

Try not to be four years into a relationship when it suddenly dawns on you that the guy you're with is a…

— Greg Behrendt

It's the prettiest place on the planet. My childhood was like a dream. It's like the last Mayberry.

— Greg Behrendt

I always tell people it's funny that they think I'm a relationship expert because my two books are about getting out of…

— Greg Behrendt

“You can’t fix people or make them change; the only thing you can do is pack your shit and leave if it…

— Greg Behrendt

I love astute observations and really great wordplay. I love the way that Louis C.K. observes life, and I love the way…

— Greg Behrendt

If a man is really into you, nothing will stop him from being with you - including a fear of intimacy.

— Greg Behrendt

The day you realize you don't have to make sense to anyone is the day you start to make sense to you.

— Greg Behrendt

Personally, when I'm picking friends, I like the ones who don't make me cry myself to sleep.

— Greg Behrendt

If you date, you will meet your share of weirdos and jerks. That is as sure as death and taxes.

— Greg Behrendt

Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out, and they're working it out on your time and with…

— Greg Behrendt

If we're friends with someone and attracted to them, we're going to want to take it further.

— Greg Behrendt

Men, for the most part, like to pursue women. We like not knowing if we can catch you. We feel rewarded when…

— Greg Behrendt

The time it takes to feel better about a breakup is directly proportional to the time it takes to feel better about…

— Greg Behrendt

How many presidents, do you think, ever said to another guy: 'I can't believe we're doing this in the White House'?

— Greg Behrendt

I'm just not interested in daytime television, which is something you should remember the next time somebody offers you a daytime talk…

— Greg Behrendt

For me, a breakup changed my entire life. I was a mess. I really got rocked, and I ended up turning it…

— Greg Behrendt

Turning a breakup into a break-over ... We want women to know that as bad as it can be, it can also…

— Greg Behrendt

Don't idolize anyone if you can. You know, be inspired by people, certainly, but don't idolize people... Because they'll let you down.

— Greg Behrendt

I'm not a big fan of comedy roasts because most of the time I find them to be really mean, but once…

— Greg Behrendt

Anyone who assesses you or your relationship as disposable is not worthy of your time or tears.

— Greg Behrendt