All Craig Benzine Quotes
- I'd choose truth over cake but I'd try to find a way to get both to be honest. Both
- The grass is always greener when it's covered in money. Always Greener
- Be cautious of bears at all times, even when being mauled by a tiger. All
- It's better to have a broken CD player that worked once than to never have evolved into a self-aware carbon based lifeform. Aware
- Cars and bumper cars are two very different things. NEVER sleep in a bumper car. Bumper
- Visiting Saturn sounds like a lot of fun but you will die! Die
- Are imperfections is which make we grate. Grate
- People alive are better than people not alive. Alive
- I would hate to be a bee. Be surrounded by bees all the time. All
- Failure is not an option. It just happens all the time. Like, all the time. All
- During a heat wave every dude stinks. Dude
- Never put a foot down in the middle of a foot rub. Down
- At one time or another, farts have coincided with every other sound, including this quote. Coincided
- If you're gonna lob something, lob love. Funny
- The only good excuse for not succeeding is DEATH! Unless you're trying to be a ghost. Then it's LIFE! Death
- The good thing about living like me is everywhere you go is a step up. Everywhere
- Blanket statements are always stupid. NO EXCEPTIONS! Blanket
- Bird Poop in the mouth is always a surprise. Bird
- Always go to the bathroom before you ‘go’ to the bathroom. Always Go
- Things that don't exist do exist. They're just really fast. Exist