“Yo momma so ugly that I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a job application.” — Various Copy Share Image
“Yo momma so ugly she makes blind children cry. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ Yo momma so ugly she makes onions” — Various Copy Share Image
“Yo momma so ugly that when she was born the doctor looked at her butt, then at her face, and said, "Twins!" ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦” — Various Copy Share Image
“Yo momma so ugly that when she was born the doctor slapped her and her parents.” — Various Copy Share Image
“Yo momma so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦” — Various Copy Share Image
“TV installer walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "You'll be served sometime between” — Various Copy Share
“Must the Earth forever be arranged like an ocean steamer, with large, luxurious rooms and luxurious food for a select few, and underneath in… — Various Copy Share
“God is worming out His and our adversaries, which He will do by little and little, till they be consumed. The covenant is seasonable.” — Various Copy Share
“it is no less since this same Confession of Faith was first subscribed and sworn to. And it has been still in use yearly… — Various Copy Share
“sees the Sights, under Perplexing Difficulties. The native borned Gothamite mite have notissed, a short time since, a venerable lookin' ex-Statesman,” — Various Copy Share
“What do you call a hundred blondes stacked on top of each other? An air mattress.” — Various Copy Share
“Thou wouldst never have chosen Him, if that loving and gracious God had not chosen thee.” — Various Copy Share
“Behold, and be awakened; behold, and be excited; behold, and be comforted; behold, and admire; behold, and wonder, that the King of heaven's Son… — Various Copy Share
“seal. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes work. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A baseball walks… — Various Copy Share
“I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?" "Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I presume you… — Various Copy Share
Craig Jones: We ain't got no sugar. Smokey: No sugar? Damn. Y'all ain't never got two things that match. Either y'all got Kool-aid, no… — Various Copy Share
“I heard that if you play a Windows CD backwards, you'll get a satanic message. But the most frightening thing is that if you… — Various Copy Share
“holiness is a privilege, as well as a duty; it is a reward, a benefit to him who walks therein.” — Various Copy Share
“Music touches our hearts and moves our souls. Music has moods. Music can make us happy, relaxed or exhilarated. Music is sounds and voices… — Various Copy Share
